Last week 38 Studios—the only video games company owned by a bored ex-baseball player—suddenly noticed it had no money left and no means by which to pay its 400-or-so staff, not to mention pay off its horrendously implausible debts.

This would be a sad state of affairs under any circumstances, but it has a particularly DKU-relevant resonance in this case, as 38 Studios happen to own Banjo-Kazooie composer Grant Kirkhope’s studio—Big Huge Games—leaving a much-beloved melody-crafting hero unjustifiably jobless.

In conclusion? The gaming industry is officially bollocks. Granted, I’m a bit stupid at the best of times; actually my stupidity far exceeds the best of times, reaching such dizzy heights as the most wanktastic and ejaculationriffic of times. But this much I do know: if any games company that boasts talent of Mr. Kirkhope’s calibre can’t make it in the industry today, there’s something fundamentally wrong with it.

Kirkhope recently finished scoring Big Huge’s critically successful (and reasonably well-sold, by any standards) RPG title The Kingdoms of Amalur; the soundtrack for which is well worth checking out. But Amalur’s reception wasn’t enough to rescue the company, which under the control of washed-out ex-baseballer Curt Schilling (pictured, right; his face looks a bit like a burger) was run into the ground.

This’d be an ideal opportunity for conspiracy theories or, at the very least, a humorous photoshop of Schilling’s face (as, oh I don’t know, a burger or something)… but that’s not (always) what we’re about. Actually, the only reason we’re running this story at all is to extend our most sincere DK Vine-flavoured love to Grant, a veritable Video Game Hero.

…oh, never mind, I couldn’t stop myself.