Home of the three people who beat Muddle Mode.
 
 





06/01/00

Slush: Well, it was the first day of June, and almost at once humid weather poured into my area. It's night as I type this, but it's unmercifully hot. I feel like I'm in a courtroom scene from an old movie with all these people dressed in Sunday clothes fanning themselves. Well, what happened today that's worth wasting my time talking about....I'm preparing to start playing to beat Mario Party 2 this weekend. Should be fun, as long as the Golf Guru doesn't make a surprise cameo appearance. We updated with Accounts tonight, and I can't say much about them because I've already said everything I have to say about them IN them and the fact that I'm trying to say something about updating with Accounts in Accounts makes my brain hurt. BRAIN HURT (runs away)!!!!!!!!

Chad: Ugh, I copied and pasted like a madman for Accounts. Oh, and I figured out how to record stuff from the N64 onto a VHS tape! I'm going to create a tape of N64 Boss Beatings. Hoh, yeah!




06/02/00

Slush: Ever been so tired your hands start to shake and go numb? That's the way I feel write now. So I'll try to make this brief and too the point without too many spelling errors. We decided around 9:30 EST tonight that we were going to update the Big Ol' Donkey Kong Stuff List (I had a few ideas of what the update could be, and Chad did too, but we decided to do the Stuff List because of the fact that the Drone List was recently updated and the Stuff List drastically needed modernizing). Let me tell you. It was hard work. The Mario Golf (Game Boy Color) stuff got a little crazy at times, especially all those flags. But once we hit the Donkey Kong 64 items and related hoobarb (not a word), it became full fledged insanity. It got to the point where it was about thirty minutes until the update cutoff when I told Chad, "We'll finish this tomorrow, and just put up what we have right now." You want an example of how maddening the task was? Look at the the horizontal Chunky switch for crying out loud! That appeared like once in the game in a darkened corner of Frantic Factory! Well, I guess that's what I originally wanted with this site: an online incyleopedeia (it's so late I don't even kare if I psell thins rong) of Donkey Kong Universe info and constantly updated news and updates. Oh well. My heart just missed a few beats. I better get to sleep, or Chad will be doing the update by himself tomorrow.

Chad: I figured out that I can hook my SNES up to the VCR! Now I'm going to create a massive tape of boss beatings / ending cinemas. WHOO!!! That's all. Oh, and Slush said that he's going to pick up on Accounts, so I guess that means I get to slack! And slack I shall!




06/03/00

Slush: Chad had to go do something tonight (I didn't ask because I respect his privacy...if the man wants to go out and disembowel cattle, than I won't pry into his private life), so he sent me his update and told me to finish the Big Ol' Donkey Kong Stuff List. Pretty simple right? Wrong. My internet connection was giving out all night, and I only had time to upload with our "extra" update and Chad's actual written Update. The same internet connection that caused the end of our update streak a couple weeks back nearly put an end to our newer, smaller streak. Luckily I was able to salvage it somewhat. I also started playing Mario Party 2 today to actually try and beat it (now that Mario Golf for Game Boy Color is a thing of the past). I noticed it is quite a bit harder than the original Mario Party as well. To savor every drip the game has to offer, I'll be busy playing it all summer probably. Anyway, it's rather late at the moment and I have to get up at 8 AM EST in the morning. Time to cut off this Account.

Chad: Hmm. I'm absent from uploading tonight due to circumstances beyond my control (e.g. not kegger). Every time I leave Slush with the site alone either Our Friend makes deals with Satan to whore out our most cherished pages, or AOL kicks the bucket for a few hours, rendering uploading impossible. Before I left, I shoved Our Friend in a half-empty box of breakfast Sausage and Cheese biscuits in the freezer, so he shouldn't cause Slush any trouble tonight. I just hope AOL is behaving. If it acts up tonight, then we should probably ditch AOL and both get DSLs. Well, provided that would be after Slush gets a new computer, because even whispering the word "download" in a two-mile radius of Slush's computer makes the memory monster awaken from his indefinite slumber. Or so I've been told. Anyway, good luck to you, Slush.




06/04/00

Slush: I was offline until about 4 PM today. I DO have a life outside of this computer, you know. I have to find time to get in my oogling of beautiful women somehow! In all seriousness, I went hiking up in the Blue Ridge Mountains and discovered something that relates to Donkey Kong Country. Most of the Blue Ridge Mountains resemble the forests from Donkey Kong Country 3 and Donkey Kong Land III, but I discovered this small stretch of land that looked nearly identical to Vine Valley from DKC. The trees looked identical and were the same hight and width. Anyway, went I came home I signed on and Chad was there assigning me to put up the rest of the Stuff List that was supposed to go up last night. After procrastinating for what had to be almost an hour, I finally obliged. Around that time Chad said he had a Feature planned for today's actual update, so I basically had the night off (all I had to do was write the Update). And that's my day in a nutshell (nut...tee hee).

Chad: Hahaha! AOL crapped out on Slush last night! I hate AOL! Anyway, we fixed the errors, and I wrote a feature. As far as the pictures in the Features go, Slush usually thinks of a concept and I do the actual image. He told me to show the heads of Arthur from Tick, Diddy, Luigi, and Grimace from the McDonalds commercials. All famous sidekicks. I decided to just do a group shot of the four. Hahaha, Diddy is riding on grimace's shoulders! It's insane! WHOOO!!! WHOO!!!! WHOOOOO!!!! Slush gets back from the ol' occupation at noon my time, but I doubt I'll be awake by then. Maybe. I'll try to wake up early, but I'm not making any guarantees. Last summer, by August my biological clock was offset nine hours from that of the rest of the complex.




06/05/00

Slush: Not much to talk about today, as everything that pretty much went on as far as the DKU and our site goes was addressed in our update today about why Dinosaur Planet is still a DKU game. We didn't come up with that explanation so we wouldn't have to eat our own words, we came up with it because we believed it. Chad was panic struken when I got online this afternoon, so much so he blocked all communications with me. I calmed him down in a hurry though (as soon as I was able to get in contact with him). Oh well.

Chad: Nothing really happened. I'll leave it to Slush, then. OH, wait! Dinosaur Planet was denounced as DKU by none other than Rare Ltd. but we had the corroborative evidence to bring it back up to DKU status. Hoo-hah! Having described everything major that happened today, I'll leave Slush to fill in the rest.




06/06/00

Slush: I really have nothing to say tonight. I'm pretty upset by Miyamoto's comments though. He's starting to believe all the unneccesary praise he gets and it's going to his head. Oh well, screw him. Tonight is the first new episode of Conan O' Brien since Andy Richter left on May 26th. Should be interesting to see how it turns out. And with that, farewell until tomorrow's Account.

Chad: Aww, crap. While tomorrow is Slush's last day of torturous occupational work, I'm depressed because tonight is the first episode of Late Night without Andy Richter. Hahaha, earlier Slush said that it would be funny if Conan walks out as usual, and Andy is standing in his normal spot, and Conan says, "What the hell are you doing here? You quit last episode!" and Andy says, "Oh, yeah. Sorry, I forgot." and walks away. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Whoa, crap, 20 minutes until showtime. Hey, I said "crap" twice this Account! Yes!




06/07/00

Slush: My computer almost came to a crashing end today. It's too complicated to explain, but the pods left behind by the "Memory Monster" that I got from my AOL CD hatched, eating Windows and not letting my crappy computer do anything. Whenever I started it up it would shut down by itself five seconds later. After several phone calls and prayers, I got Windows reinstalled. The good thing was, it's Chad's update day and that would have saved my skin for 24 hours. Whatever. And I just won an auction on eBay for a Conan Emmy Considerationi Tape. Considering another one sold for up to 100 dollars, I got a bargain (under 30).

Chad: I don't care.




06/08/00

Slush: I'm pretty sure my toenails did more than I did today, but that's okay....who needs exercise when you have a failing body? Anyway, since I don't feel like talking about much.....I'll end this Account. Oh, but I do enjoy those Pikachu pictures we put in Letters. It's fun figuring how we can torture the creature differently each edition...

Chad: I fell asleep on the couch yesterday. And Our Friend beated off while watching naked cameras on Cinemax. It's really weird how he does it. You know, being a camera with no sexual organs and all. Uh.... bye




06/09/00

Slush: Banjo-Tooie has been delayed by a couple of weeks. Chad always seem unrealistically distraught over this sort of news, but I never really let it bother me. It comes with the territory. If games came out when they were supposed to, we'd have Conker two and a half years ago....and we still don't have it.

Chad: Today I discovered that Lunchables is doing a DK64 promotion! Hey-hey! Guess we'll have to do the unspeakable and update the DK64 Marketing Campaign page. Oy, I thought that was long-over. Oh, well. We also need to somehow create a Random DKU Merchandise page for all the stupid crap I'm buying off eBay, including a giant DKC POG game by Milton Bradley! Remember Donkey Kong? He's back.... in POG form.




06/10/00

Slush: Well...I'll admit something to you spineless sheep porking dirty crotch snatchers. I played Perfect Dark today. Yeah, my friend wanted me to go over to his place and play it. I decided to go, just because I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. What I found was a really fun game.....for the first hour. I got really sick of playing it, as it was all SHOOT SHOOT DIE DIE again and again and again and again while my friend was drooling. I swear, I don't know what the big deal is. It's a good game, but too repetitive. The one thing that really made it for me was this: Shigeru Miyamoto's face as a drone in multi-player mode. I put his face on a character in a dress and gunned him down yelling "STAR FOX IS A PAINFUL ENEMA(?)" But even that got old after awhile. Still...I got to shoot down Miyamoto today. While I don't "get" Rare's first person shooters, I would like to thank them for this little pleasure.

Chad: Oh, I forgot to mention a few days ago that Slush finally killed off the memory monster! So that means that his memory won't deplete, it just will stay at its almost-completely-used-up status. And we finally started work on what will be the biggest feature the Vine has ever seen. But you won't hear a thing about it for a few months! Don't even bother e-mailing asking what it is, we'll just send you packing! AHAHAHAAA! Hey, I forgot how horrible Saturday nights were in the summer. There's absolutely NOTHING on TV. I'm just watching Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom for about the billionth time. That movie rules because no matter how many times you see it, it never gets old. Oh, and the Indy series is just like the DKC series in that the second one (DKC2 and Temple of Doom) was the best, the third one (DKC3 and The Last Crusade) was the second-best, and the worst of the three (by a VERY small margin in the case of DKC) is the first (DKC and Raider of the Lost Ark). Okay, well, I stopped the movie to upload around 11:00 PM, and it's 3:24 AM right now, so I suppose I'd better get back to it, eh?




06/11/00

Slush: Most of the stuff on television Sunday night is total bullsh-t smeared on the hood of a truck that hauls bullsh-t from the places where bull's sh-t to the place where they dump the sh-t of a bull. Then somebody goes to our site, and see's an update about Lunchables. Man, is entertainment GONE on Sunday nights?

Chad: Tonight was bloody insane. And the TV sucked.




06/12/00

Slush: Today, DKC for Game Boy Color has been delayed. Man, that must be how NOA gets their kicks. They should just spend their time in strip clubs and stop delaying our games, already (if Rare isn't finished with it or wants to make it better, then fine...if it is finished and NOA wants to put it on the shelf before releasing it....screw them). Oh yeah, and those new N64 designs are horrible. Why put a giant Pikachu on them? WHY? They could have made N64's with different characters (DK on one, Mario on another, Link on another, and then two Pokemon if they really wished) but NO, they had to milk Pokemon even further. Geez.

Chad: I wrote my Mario Party review and we found out that Mario Party was delayed. Wait, no, I mean Donkey Kong Country. Sorry, it's just really late. Arrrgh, I needs me sleep. Why the bloody hell does my local NBC affiliate have to show Late Night at 2: friggin' 10 in the morning? ARGH! Everyone else gets it sooner than that! BLARGH!




06/13/00

Slush: Can't say much about today.

Chad: Talked some with Aussie Ben. Oh, and NDK64 Guy today revealed that he is in fact NOT pregnant. He told me he was a few weeks ago, but I found out it was all a lie today! Yahahahahahaaa!




06/14/00

Slush: I can't even remember what I did today. It's embarrising too. I can't even listen to the Banjo-Tooie MP3's because my crappy computer can barely handle being turned on, and the ravages of what the Memory Monster did to it are far too great. Apparently Chad says they're really good though, so I'll take his word for it.

Chad: With every day I look more and more forward to banjo-Tooie. And this was fueled by THREE BANJO-TOOIE MP3s!!!! I had heard a bit of Mayahem Temple one from the dailyradar.com B-T video, but it was scratchy and cut down. There are little hidden things in the "comments" part of the files! WHEEE! This is awesome! And the world TITLES! Hailfire Peaks! HAHAHA!!! TAKE THAT, ESRB!!!




06/15/00

Slush: I don't have much time to write this Account (as I can barely stay awake as it is and I'm about to tell Chad, who's also online, that I'm going to call it quits today) but I'd like to say that I've been playing Mario Party 2 a lot recently and it's a damn good game. Much better then the (great) original. Yawn.

Chad: (shrugs shoulders)




06/16/00

Slush: Our site's down as I write this. That's unusual, because our site barely goes down, and when it does go down, it's only for an hour tops. Oh well. I'm confident it will be up tomorrow. We did manage to update before it went down, so at least we got that out of the way.

Chad: I watched Episode One today. Oh, yes, and the site's down. I'm going to lay in a fetal position in a corner now and weep. BYE!




06/17/00

Slush: Hoh hoh hoh! Lightening caused our site to go down, and now it's in complete and utter shambles. I don't even care to look at the mess it has become, as it's rather painful to look at. Most of today (when I was online) consisted of Chad and I laughing about how the site has crumbled to the ground, and how it was a good thing he had everything saved (I don't...because my Memory Monster distraught computer). Hopefully it will be up soon.

Chad: Well, things are looking a bit more up than yesterday on the exploded server front, I guess. I certainly hope we're up by Monday, because we're expecting some very important visitors to the site. Oh, heh heh, I mean IN ADDITION to you all! Heh heh! Ahem.




06/18/00

Slush: Hey hey hey! We didn't even bother to do an update today. We had something planned yesterday that would be a rather hillarious Feature using many different pictures to make a story, but now that's been put on the backburner as the site is on hiatus and in limbo mode. At least we get a little vacation from the hectic lifestyle of updating every possible day we can.

Chad: Well, hey! I didn't do a damned thing today except moan about how our server is down. WHOO!!!




06/19/00

Slush: Our site is still down, down, down (that's ripped-off from MST3K episode 803, the Mole People). But at least I don't have to do any work tonight either. Man, I could get use to this lazy lifestyle. Maybe if I get too used to it I could get a job at Gun Toting Retro Net! Oh, who am I kidding. Chad's the real hard worker on the site. I basically send stuff to him every few days while he does all the uploading and basic html work (as I can't save anything to my computer, I can't do the html work because I can't...save anything and then upload it). But at least I have an excuse for not doing any work now.

Chad: Well, hey. I didn't do a damned thing today except whine about how our server is down. WHOO!!!




06/20/00

Slush: Since we got back online tonight, we wanted to do what we generally consider to be our readers' (all four of them) basic favorite update, Letters. It was our little way of saying "we're sorry we can't control where lightning goes." More example of Chad's insane (but good) dedication to the site: he's uploading every single page that has been updated and uploaded since May 7th. Geez.

Chad: Well, hey. I didn't do a damned thing today except bitch about how our server is down. WHOO!!! Except this time I did the bitching to the hosting company, and they fixed everything! WHOOO!!!! Well, now we're back, with a brand new Letters. So go check it out! Wait.... this isn't Updates. By the time you read this, Letters will be 10 days old. Hahaha, I'm stupid!




06/21/00

Slush: While I could argue that today is actually MY update day, Chad did it and I'm not going to complain (yesterday we both did the update, and the day before was his update day). Anyway, nothing to gripe over as we never actually have an assigned update day. We just got into the habit of doing our updates every other day. It's good protocol that way. Looking back at the early days of our site, Chad himself did the first several or so updates (the first update is not credited, as it wouldn't be fair to the other person that the first ever update is done by the...other person. Man I'm bad at talking...or....writing my thoughts....this sucks). Then I stepped in when Poison Ivy overtook him, then he did it a few more days, then we slowly got in the pattern we're in today. Why in blazes did I just waste an entire Account talking about this? Like you really care....or like I really care.

Chad: Well, I'm actually typing this on my brithday (2:03 AM, June 22) but it isn't tomorrow until I wake up in my brain. Today I ripped off some render of Banjo-Tooie form Nintendo Power magazine and tomorrow I'll rip off some shots. Slush got a Conan O'Brien tape in the mail today that he won from eBay. I have yet to recieve my Virtual Boy with Wario Land, Mario's Tennis, and the best Virtual Boy game of all, GALACTIC PINBALL! Slush says that Virtual Boy smells like outer space, but I think my cat, Sabre, smells like outer space. We'll have to see if the Virtual Boy smells like Sabre, won't we? And we'll also have to see if I get the video capture unit for my birthday tomorrow (as it was one of the only things I asked for). We're going to be putting video on the site soon. Not just game video...... ORIGINAL VIDEO! Stop motion. Stuff like that. Wheee! Okay, Late Night with Conan O'Brien is coming on. I'm off! (whoosh, then a thundrous clap)




06/22/00

Slush: I enjoy the new Banjo-Tooie screenshots. If they were a sexy lady, I'd make love to them. See; being lazy I could get a job at Gun Toting Retro Net, and with humor like that I could get a job at Nintendorks. I'm always sizing up other job oppurtunities as I heard a rumor from Our Friend that Chad's considering replacing me with a pair of shorts (something about being more productive then me with a better sense of humor...). Oh well. It doesn't faze me, as I'm still upset about the B-T delay by several months. Come ON, Nintendo! Give up on Pokemon already! Oh, and it was Chad's birthday today! He's a healthy 54 today

Chad: I didn't get my Virtual Boy in the mail. Damn. We posted some sweet B-T shots! Yay! I'm really looking forward to Banjo-Tooie, I can only hope upon hope (?) that the IGN news about the delay isn't true. Ugh, a WHOLE EIGHTSOMETHING MONTHS??? Auuuugh! Oh, well. It'll be a great game nonetheless. Oh, yeah, and today was my birthday.




06/23/00

Slush: I'd like to comment, if I caaan, on the Donkey Kong Country screenshots (for Game Boy Color). If this doesn't show that Rare is the master of graphics, I don't know what does. They can squeeze such quality in such an inferior system...it simply boggles the mind. They did it to the SNES, they've done wonders with the limitations of the N64, and they're doing it with all Game Boy platforms. Can't see what they have up their sleeve for Game Boy Advance. Hopefully they'll use ACM again for original games on that system...

Chad: I forget




06/24/00

Slush: I was gone all day buying illegal law-abiding explosives on the Pennsylvania border today at a place called "Phantom Fireworks." It's a chain of fireworks stores, mostly found on the East Coast, that have lots of great merchandise. My bill totaled over 200 dollars today though. Maybe I went a little overboard, but I had to buy the "Ass Choppers" (seriously....there were fireworks called Ass Choppers, complete with "Kick Ass Effect"). I can't wait to set them off on the 4th of July....Independence Day if you will.

Chad: And back down it goes. Well, this is a crappy way to end my seemingly good Saturday. I even won the absolute coolest eBay auction ever.... a poster of Dragonheart (my favorite movie) autographed by none other than Sean Connery! WHOO!! Well, the site's down so my thoughts are on that now. Stupid domain registration. We registered it for two years and it's only been six months! ARGH!




06/25/00

Slush: After our site experienced more troubles last night and early today (our site wasn't actually down, the address just wouldn't connect), we're back AGAIN. Luckily we didn't miss an update and we kept on chugging like a certain Viagra popping U.S. Senator. Not much else to say....nope, not a thing. My electricity went out earlier today, but it came back on....only for me to discover my cable was out. So I've been bored all night, yes I have.

Chad: I tried setting up the video capture unit today but it didn't really work. I got a few of the stop-motions on the computer, but there's one left that's just great. Humph. Every time I try to get it the computer freezes. Grr.




06/26/00

Slush: I decided to write my Feature RTDKCCS: HITMVSACMTBMHIACCO today on a whim. I just felt like I had to bring up the DKC cartoon issue one more time before it was lost in the ages (and the archives of Letters). Pokemon is still a hot argument though, and there's still plenty of material left to bash it hard into the ground.

Chad: Yargh. Point Five. I really don't know where I'm going with this. Oh yeah, it turns out the disc was corrupted, so I took it back to Comp USA and got another one. It's late and I spent all evening changing white-background things to black-background things so they would look good on the site. Here's an exerpt from a conversation I had with Slush three minutes, twentyseven seconds ago:
Me: I actually LIKE converting white-background things to black-background things for the site. Am I crazy?
Slush: You are very
And there you have it, folks. Undeniable proof that I'm kind of hungry and there's some leftover fried chicken in the refridgerator and I'm going to eat it now.




06/27/00

Slush: I really wish I could listen to the BFD MP3's, but I've already said why I can't (the same reason I can't listen to the Banjo-Tooie MP3's....I hate my computer). Once again, Chad tells me they're really good, so I shot him. Yes, I shot him through the computer. Or I just shot my computer. Which would explain the explosion. And the fire. Oh dear God.

Chad: Last night's chicken was good. And so is the farty Pooland music. And the creepy spider music. And the 20's nightclub heist music. I can't wait for Conker's BFD. Okay, well, so far Rare has posted new info on DKC, B-T, and Conker. Looks like either PD or Dinosaur Planet is up for some new stuff. And we all know which one it'll be. Perfect Dark. Ugh.




06/28/00

Slush: I tried to make Chad proud of me today (as I'm always the lazy one...hire me Gun Toting Retro Net...I can not update for longer then YOU can!) by getting up and writing our update before he even got online. He thanked me by sending death threats to my future wife and children. Then Our Friend kicked me in the shin. Man, I did NOT have a good day.

Chad: I've got to wake up at the crack-o-dawn tomorrow. Har har, it's already 8:00 AM in England. 2:00 here. And I still have to watch Conan! WHOO!!! Oh yeah, and I am not proud of Slush at ALL. (old man scowl)




06/29/00

Slush: Slush: You know WHAT I HATE?
Audience: WHAT????
Slush: WHEN NINTENDO OF AMERICA GETS HIGH AND DECIDES TO DELAY ALL THE GOOD GAMES THEY CAN DELAY AND THEN SUCK ON THE NON-EXISTANT MAN-THING OF THE POKEMON SERIES AND RUB THE NON-EXISTANT TIGHT NIPPLES OF THE ZELDA SERIES AND SAY SCREW YOU TO ALL THE FANS OF THEIR OTHER GAMES! THEN THEY GO MAKE DOG FOOD AND LAUGH ABOUT MAKING THEIR DOG FOOD OVER FINE IMPORTED CIGARS FROM BRAZIL...THE KIND MY UNCLE PINEAPPLE THE MONKEY F'ER MADE WHEN HE WAS A SLAVE!! YEAH!!!!!

Chad: Slush and I decided that when talking, the right side of the screen is better than the left side. And your average random uneventful stuff happened as well. WHEEOOOEEOOO!!!!




06/30/00

Slush: Uh....looks like none of those games have been delayed. Looks like Chad was right all along.....I'm going to go.....get offline now......and hide in shame.......and make several more confusing periods...............................I think I need even more...................................yeah..........yeah....that should do.......

Chad: Since my last few Accounts have been crap, I'll fill you in on some stuff that happened. I got a Japanese import toy of Donkey and Diddy riding in a minecart! Sweet, huh? Uh... also... I like the BFD music! And that's about it. Good night. OH, wait. Today I decided I'll bid on eBay for a video card for the computer that will allow awesome screenshots and movies. AND I can play the Nintendo on the computer. You just hook the system up to the card. And you can also hook up a video camera. So I'm probably going to return the $100 program from Comp USA and get this $60.00 one from eBay that happens to be several hundred times better! BWAHAHAHAAAA!!!! And tomorrow I'll have to do Accounts html. UGH.