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Movie Analysis
Okay, let's see what the infamous new batch of Donkey Kong 64 movies tells us, eh? The important part of each shot is colored, for easy viewability. Aren't we nice?
Our first video shows our old pal Diddy in some sort of temple (most likely in the Angry Aztec stage). But what's this? It seems there's a door between two cleverly placed Gongs. And who's on the door? Why, it's old Wrinkly! Just look at the old hag. Now she's truly confirmed for all you people who thought we just made up the WRINKLY WHEEL.
Next, we see Diddy running into the island in which K. Lumsy is being held captive in a giant bird cage. This video doesn't reveal much, except a better view of the giant Kremling.
Phew, this one's a doozy. First, we see Tiny swimming as some cheerful music plays in the background. She hears some giggling, and jumps onto an island to investigate. She looks upwards, towards the source. But as she does so, we see a glimpse of two things that are very easy to overlook.... Donkey Kong Island and
the new Crocodile Isle. Neat, huh? Yeah, it is. So Tiny looks upwards, locates the object, and pulls out her camera. Now she takes a picture of what appears to be a bird (unsing DK brand film). The picture comes out, like a Polaroid, and displays a green check. Tiny's taken to a new
scene, where a large fairy with a banana peel on her head (this is obviously what she just took a picture of, only it was smaller) sprinkles some stuff on her. I guess Candy's not the only supple character in the game, eh? So then Tiny goes back to the island with
the fairy gone, but all of her items fill up again! She giggles and skips off like a moron.
This one, as well as the next one, go hand-in-hand with the psycho Banana Fairy movie. This movie shows Donkey Kong running around at night, with rain pouring down on him. We have recently learned that the weather conditions happen randomly when the Kongs are outside, just like actuality. Anyway, a Kritter-type Kremling runs towards him. He makes swift work of it with his coconut gun, and plods onward. In the distance, we can see a huge monolith of a Banana Fairy's head. Could this be a parody of Planet of the Apes, one of the 25 best movies starring apes? Perhaps. Probably. Knowing Rare, definitely.
The last video seems nice and normal at first... Donkey climbs a tree, Simian Slams a patch of dirt for no good reason, swings across a waterfall on vines, and lands. But when you look in the background on this picture, you can see an odd gray rock. Look back at the picture of Tiny getting more items. See that identical gray rock in the distance? Could this mean that Donkey is on the back of the new Crocodile Isle? Could this mean that Rare's artists were too lazy to make a new polygonal rock? Could it mean that the game is so stuffed into the cart and expansion pak that they didn't have space for a new rock model? The latter is probably correct, but who cares? It's a possibility! Oh yeah, and Donkey Kong shoots a Zinger, collects a melon piece, and saves humanity by attempting to combat all of the world's known strands of the E. Boli virus at once. Ahem.
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