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04/30/00
No!!! I missed an edition of letters!! Now my life will never be
complete!! All I have are my bouncy kangaroos and cuddly koalas (with
their razor sharp claws) to comfort me! Oh woe is me.
Well, anyway, over here in upside down land, we've just celebrated
Easter. Well, hardey-har, the Easter bunny gets here a day earlier than
the rest of the world. Buggered if I know why. Let's just accept it
and move on, shall we?
My, that DKCGBC certainly looks like it will be a whole heap o' fun. And
don't worry, I'm not ruling out the use of the transfer Pak thingy
either. I certainly hope that it will cause something to happen with
the pillar in Creepy Castle - or something. That would be nice, and
then Leigh would be wrong. Ooooh - kill two birds with one stone, it
would. Anyway, I'm just spouting gibberish now, so I'll leave you be.
Huzzah for melted snow,
-Aussie Ben
Slush: Well, you didn't miss this edition of Letters, so you can quit playing with your boomerangs and crocodile hunting. Chad is still hoping for some sort of Transfer Pak connection with the GBC version of DKC, but we seriously don't think there will be. Too bad Rare didn't plan ahead for DKC (GBC) when making DK64...but maybe they did. Wait and see, I suppose. Until then, the pillar remains a giant motionless dildo.
Hooooowdy hoooo!Hehe,sorry for the Mr. Hankey intro.Well,I,Sean Francis
King,is back!Or should that be "am back"?Hmmmmm....
Ah,what the heck.Also,don't worry about the different e-mail-my new Yahoo
one won't work,and I'm pretty much abandoning my old one.
Anyway,before I offically start this letter(wait a second,I did offically
start it!I think I'll fill this little thing with various
ramblings:DEMOCRACY STINKS!!!WAAAAH!!!)
Before I continue,I want to add onto my game idea from last time:
1)Here's something REALLY special for you guys-in my game,Donkey Kong:The
Final Battle,the MOONMAN,yes,the MOONMAN,is playable.But you need to unlock
him first.If you collect 7 MOONMAN tokens scattered around the game,you'll
unlock the MOONMAN for playable use!His moves are has follows:
-Flying(requires Krem Wands)
-Piledriver(Jump,then press the attack button)
-Various other moves(give me suggestions!)
Not only can you unlock the MOONMAN,but he's also in various other
places(i.e.,pictures of him in various locations,controlling him in his
Astro Car when in one of the various racing mini-games,etc.)
With that out of the way,time for my theroy on what the central game of the
DKU is.
It's not DKC.
It's not Banjo-Kazooie.
It's not Conker's Bad Fur Day.
IT'S DIDDY KONG RACING!!!!
Yes,what is most likely the most hated DKU game(by 97% percent of the
population-you and Slush like the game,I'm not sure about Our Friend,and if
it wasn't for the fact that it was incredibly innovative and had DKU
characters I liked,I would have dumped it since I usually hate racing
games,explaining why I uck at the racing mini-games in DK64.But I LOVE
DKR!All it took was renting it for a week,and I knew I had to have it!And
this () thing is super long,so I'll end this () thing now)is the central
game of the DKU.Why?Read on.
You see,Diddy Kong Racing is linked to EACH AND EVERY ONE of the DKU games
out there.Here's my chart below:
DONKEY KONG COUNTRY SERIES/DONKEY KONG LAND SERIES/VARIOUS EARLY
CAMEOES-DIDDY KONG RACING-BANJO SERIES
-CONKER SERIES
-ANY MORE SERIES
If a game,like,say Dino Planet,is a DKU game,it'll be linked to DKR because
it will HAVE to have something from either DKR itself or one of the other
DKU games to be a DKU game,and since all DKU games are linked to DKR,Dino
Planet(if it's a DKU game)will/should/could/whatever the hell ya want be
linked to DKR.
You see,the DKU series started with DKC.It went on and on,with the other two
DKC games,the DKL games,and Mario Kart 64.Then Diddy Kong Racing came.Since
Diddy Kong is the star,and Diddy is a major character in the DKU,that's how
the Donkey Kong part fits in.Conker and Banjo were introduced in DKR,so
their respective series are linked to said holy racing game as well.Any
other DKU game will HAVE to have something related to any part of the DKU to
be part of the DKU,so it will be linked to DKR.
Hope you liked my theroy.Hopefully,people will read this,and,in their quest
to get important DKU games,will rush out and grab a copy-buying it or
otherwise.In other words,this theroy might help this game get popular
again.Until the next time I write,so long and watch where ya step!
-Sean King-Patiently(yeah right)awaiting the day a Mr.Mooney award is in his
scruffy claw..er...hands.Wait,my hands aren't scruffy!!!RAGH!
P.S.:I'm not sure,but ever since I started visiting your site,I've been
liking Pokémon less and less.Now,if you'll excuse me,I must go back to
worshipping....gorilla....I will...obey...I will...obey...
Chad: You should be sorry for that intro. And it's spelt "Hanky". I don't look at the e-mail adresses unless someone forgets to sign their letter, and so far you have been faithful in that. Well, since this little update for your previous game has come to fruition, I will now announce that game as THE BEST FAN GAME IDEA EVER! Ahem.  You deserve the Mr. Mooney Award for that. Ye-us! Although you left off MOONMAN's trademark Circus Peanuts of Justice move, in which the MOONMAN forces circus peanuts down his enemies' throats, and then they melt as if drinking acid. There should be a minigame where the MOONMAN runs down the Fry Kids in his Astro Car. I would play that over and over... Now, on to the bulk of your letter.
Yes, you are correct on this one. All games are linked to DKR in one way or another. And it should be noted that this Letter was written two days before Dinosaur Planet was even announced. Yes, Dinosaur Planet's Tricky was in DKR, so that's the connection. Good call. It's not my most hated DKU game. I don't think it's Slush's. As for Our Friend, it's his absolute favorite videogame of all time. MAN, you should see him racing with T.T. He's UNSTOPPABLE! I plow him down time and time again with missiles and he ALWAYS bounces back! Anyway, I sure hope this made more people want to play DIddy Kong Racing, as it is an incredibly underrated piece of plastic and silicon.
No need to RAGH, the Award is yours.
P.S. Yes! YES!! Our plan is working! Erm... uhh... I mean, uhh... You so crazy!
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR POKEMON RULES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
-Pikachump
P.S. Pikachamp did not make me say this (looks around and whispers "help me")
what did you say my furry (and also scaly and feathery) friend dang dropped my gun...
oh hi, uh i was wondering when your going to update your DK timevine
-Pikachamp A.K.A owner of Pikachump
P.S. you should get a message board and chatroom
Slush: I'm...confused. There are two of you now? Well, that doesn't change the fact that Pokemon blows shriveled wing-wang. You Poke-freaks can multiply all you want, you can't stop the REVOLUTION from taking place. And, uh, we're updating the TimeVine when we get the time.
P.S....someday.
Dear Freind,
I've already met Slush and Chad but now I thought I might get to know the... camera. I would like to thank you for the screenshots of DKC (GBC) if you were part of getting that. It looks really great but I still think they should have waited until GBA came out to release it. Maybe we'll see DKC 2 or 3 on that handheld.
Forgive me for my absence in the last issue of letters. I was busy trying to destroy my brother, Mario. To make up for my time gone, well, I thought I might submit another game idea, sorry guys. I think you will like this one. I'll try and make it short. This is for all those dumb morons who mailed you in the last letters edition:
Game Title: DK-Pokemon, gotta destroy 'em all
System: N64
Genre: 2D Platformer/RPG
Story: After Donkey Kong duked it out with Pikachu and Jigglypuff in SSB, he wasn't sattisfied. So, Donkey & Diddy Kong and DK's father, Cranky, journeyed far to reach the Pokemon. They were on a quest to destroy all Pokemon......
Characters: Of course, you play the roles of Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong. Cranky follows you and gives you guidance and the supplies you need. On your journey, you must face Ash and the other humans in the Pokemon Universe. You must also seek out and destroy every Pokemon. The final pokemon to battle is none other than Pikachu.
Levels: The 2D platform levels look much like DKC. These levels take place about 40% of the game.
-adam85@gateway.net
Our Friend: Actually, with the screenshot thing, I just sort of post them on the Screenshots page. I only take pictures when we need one that isn't elsewhere on the internet. Like in the DKC (GBC) shot analysis. Those pitures of SNES are all my doing. Bow down to me.
I will never forgive you for your abscence. NEVER. I will take my grudge to the big Comp USA in the sky.
As for the game, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Someone should really make this nonsensical game, just because it involves the torture and slaughtering of helpless Pokemon in their homeland! Rather like DKC2, only the crocodile men are replaced with rabid mice and pink balloons with ears.
"Slush: Digimon blows worse than Pokemon. At least the Pokemon show isn't
a blatant ripoff of Digimon, as it is in the world of vice versa."
Wrongo roo. The whole Digimon fad came 5 years before Pokemon in Japan. They
both extended from video games (In Digimon's case, The virtual pet.) It does
seem like Digimon came after since Saban (the guy who owns Fox Kids) bought
the show from Toei to compete for ratings. Still, I personally enjoy Digimon.
-MegamorphJ@aol.com
Slush: Yes, I know Digimon came before Pokemon. BUT, Digimon was just a virtual pet, or a virtual "fighting monster" if I remember correctly. I was comparing the Digimon SHOW to the Pokemon show. It's painfully ripped off from the Pokemon characters. And the guy who owns Saban owns Fox Kids? That would explain why the Power Rangers are still on television after dying out 4 and a half years ago. And you can go ahead and enjoy Digimon. Keep the money away from Pokemon, I always say.
Chad, This is from one of your recent updates:
"Also, there are six new residents in the Dinosaur Planet Renders and Concept Art section. Some of the pictures include what we hoped, Tricky. Though he seems to be juvinile Triceratops in these pictures. His two eyebrow horns haven't even developed yet. That means that this game is a prequel of sorts, and that Tricky really CAME FROM THE STARS!!!"
A game cannot be a prequel if it is a first game in a series!!!
Oh yeah, I just wanted to let you guys be the first to know that I will be starting construction next week of a website which has the working name of "All Things Nintendo". That is just a working name. It's going to feature two main sections. One about pretty much everything Nintendo (past, present, future) and the second area will be about the Mushroom Kingdom. If the sites works well I may add a DK area but until then all things DK wil have to stick in the nintendo area.
I would like to hear any suggestions or ideas for a name if you would like?
See you guys around,
-Little Luigi
P.S. WALUIGI! THAT GUY FROM MARIO TENNIS SUCKS!!
P.S.S. All you people defending Pokemon have to play something other than Game Boy. It's ok if you're 8 or 8 but I mean if your past that age... COME ON!
Chad: Actually, Dinosaur Planet is a game in the Donkey Kong Universe series. But if you want to be more specific, since Tricky is the only connection to any other game, Dinosaur Planet is a prequel to Diddy Kong Racing. Sure, it'll probably spawn its own sequels and prequels, but it will always have started off as a DKR prequel. A name suggestion for your site about Mario, with a the rest of Nintendo tucked away nicely into a page or two? Okay, let's see..... how about "Miyamoto Blowjob Net"? Too risque? Fine, then, just stick with what you have.
P.S. I AGREE! LET'S KILL HIM!!!
P.S.S. Yeah, all you little 8 or 8 year olds! Grow up! Learn to correctly press the "9" key!
Ok the word to end all words POKEMON AND DONKEY KONG UNIVERSE GAMES ARE BOTH
GOOD! Why can't every gamer live in peace. And if you don't like something
don't say it! And think about it have you ever played super smash brpther's
with pikachu on your team and you playing as dk? Why if I could combo up one
bunch of character's other then pikachu with kirby or ness i'd be with DK so
CAN WE ALL LIVE IN PEACE!!!!!!!!!!!
-Dantv64dan@aol.com
Slush: Can we all live in peace? The problem is, about 96% of the video game portion of the internet is devoted to Pokemon. We're practically the only ones who are as fanatical about DK  as others are insane about Pokemon. We're trying to stick up for what we believe in without being pushed over and forgotten by the evil Pokemon. But I suppose we can live in peace. I guess I better not post that picture of Pikachu getting his nipples pierced against his will by a wind-up mouse from Conker's Pocket Tales now. Oh, CRAP! My freakin' finger slipped! I'll hear about this one in the morning!
Hi, im a first time caller, long time listener. Or whatever. Anyway, i'm
gonna sum up all my thoughts about your site in one letter. Firstly,
everyone who disses you for making up stuff about the DKU is wrong. Your
allowed to daydream about the characters and junk, cuz i do i do that myself.
Did you see the the new 1999 Nintendo Power awards yet? i'm so glad, Tiny
Kong won best new hero! Some think that shes just a dixie-ripoff, an excuse
for a new character. Not me. I totally love Tiny! Shes kewl and junk.
Whadya you guys think about Tiny, good idea for a character or bad?
i like the way you update daily, i check everyday. What do tou guys
think about Conker's Bad Fur Day? I think, personally, it's a dumb idea.
Rare shouldda just kept twelve tales, cuz all the "mature" teens it's aimed
at already know that Conker is a character for younger kids. Dumb idea,
right?...
well, thats all i got to say. your fan,
-Lemonyfresh.
Chad: Or should it be long time eyeballer of text? That sounds much more accurate than "listener". Everyone loves to eyeball our text. Yeah. But most of our stuff isn't entirely made up. Such as Squeaks and Flapper. There are two purple parrots seen in the games. They were just failed to be given names. We're mostly gap-filler-inners. I'm not glad Tiny won. She's a great character and all, but that award should have rightfully gone to Lanky. What, you don't like Bad Fur Day? We think it's a great idea! If you're concerned that people already know Conker was aimed for younger people, don't be. Hardly anyone remembers Twelve Tales. Conker's Bad Fur Day proves that Rare is willing to try new things rather than stick to the profitable, butheavily used "cutesy" platformer genre. Also, there is a brass testicle furnace man. What's not to love about that?
when mumbo lifts the train, maybe the pad is what lets you play as mumbo
(like in rocket:robot on wheels)
-SeanMR68@aol.com
Slush: I have a theory that it might be what lets you use voodoo magic, or charge voodoo magic, or let you do a voodoo stunt you couldn't do elsewhere. Like lifting the train for example.
They really do use The Word "Hell" in DH64? Where do They Use it? Thank you
-kblakely@alltel.net
Chad: Actually, they use the word "hell" quite prominently in the nonexistant Die Hard 64 game. Where have you been? Okay, if you want a straight answer, the word "Hell" can be found at the very end of the DK64 Monkey Rap, where Chunky is proclaimed "One hell of a guy". Not a big deal, really.
Leigh Loveday came out of the closet - er, cage in India and decided to
come back and update Rare. There are some great updates finally. Including
the two-in-a-row scribes and screenshots and mp3s. How often do you write to
them, anyway?
Donkey Kong Country for the Game Boy Color looks great, but I wonder why
they don't have any screen shots for the
bosses.....hmmm.....interesting.........
Allow me to rank the DK games, from best to worst.
1.) Donkey Kong Country 2 (100%)
2.) Donkey Kong Country (97%)
3.) Donkey Kong 64 (93%)
4.) Donkey Kong Land (90%)
5.) Donkey Kong Country 3 (84%)
6.) Donkey Kong Land 3 (79%)
7.) Donkey Kong Land 2 (53%)
It may seem ironic how I ranked DKC2 first and DKL2 second, but the GB
version was basically a remake of SNES version with much, much worse graphics
(and music).
Don't you thing DKC2 had the best music? Some of the best themes were the
Wasp Hive, Big Boss, Haunted Hallway, and the Mine Shaft.
-SirNick5@AOL.com
P.S. Now they have Super Greed on FOX. Doesn't that sound like a Nintendo
game? Speaking of which, FOX is at a huge downfall with some of the worst
shows that I have ever seen.
Slush: I haven't written to Scribes in a long time. This site is all consuming with my online time. I think you were fair with your rankings, but I would switch some stuff around (like putting DKC3 higher than DKC. DKC has a special place in my heart, but the fact is DKC3 is all around better...it just came out at the wrong time). Interesting statement about the bosses. That would kick giraffe anus if they had new bosses, but Rare may consider that too much of a radical change from the original. And yes, DKC2 has the best music. Nothing has matched it in the DKU. My favorites are the Mine Shaft, Funky's Theme, the theme from Pirate Panic, Klubba's "Court Music" (there's a reason we call it Court Music, but really we have no idea why), and the Lost World Map Screen Theme. P.S....FOX is really annoying. I hate when they have "Sweeps Theme Months." Back in Feb., they had the irratating "Fox has the BIG SHOWS," and now they have "Turn it up NOW." Somebody shoot them now. They haven't been the same since Married...With Children ended (boy, that's a sad statement, isn't it?)
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Donkey Kong Universe is an independent game news source with no affiliation to Nintendo, Microsoft, or any other developer. All original content copyright © 1999 - 2008 File Two Productions.
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