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05/05/01
This just in: We were going to ask Ray Combs, from Family Feud fame, what the deal is with that connection, but then we found out he commited suicide.
Well Well.
I see Dr. KillPika has been taking a vacation..
C'mon Boy, Get off your lazy arse and Slice That Rat's head off. Come on
now, Get to work!
-WackySpacePuppy
Chad: Dr. KillPika was done away with by Grimy Nintendo Lawyer, Esq.
I would like to added to your links. Preferably under the miscellaneous part. My site is {yoink!}. My E-mail is ffunyman2@hotmail.com.
-ffunyman2@hotmail.com
Ben: I'm sure you would. Unfortunately for you, we now have quality control, and seeing as your so-called site was just full of crap advertising anyway, you can go and bugger off. Feel free to send your comments about how pathetic the site was to the above address.
Dear Slush,
I've got you all figured out, you intentionally left the site!!
The battle was staged to allow yourself to leave the site without having to
resign just because you're bored of DKVine!!
You've had this planned since Aussie Ben joined haven't you? The end of
"BUCK ASS SLUSH WEEK so I'll do whatever I like 'cos it doesn't matter"
marked the last time you wrote for the site!
The additional idea of getting rid of Our Friend was a bonus for the other
two, I bet Chad regrets ever inventing a soul inhabited camera!
Well, um, I'll be quiet now, didn't mean my outburst, was surprised I worked
out (I've gotta be right!!).
Good luck with whatever you do, that goes for your van too.
-Karlie (and you thought you were mad...)
Slush: Haw haw, I'm not quite gone. The April Fool's joke did plug slightly into reality though. I am rather restless with the site right now, mainly because you can only write so much about Donkey Kong week after week without losing your friggin' mind. I'm not going to quit though. I'll always have ties to the site somehow, even if I do "take a leave of absence" sometime in the distant future. Oh, and what's this about Chad "inventing" Our Friend? We've said it before and I'll say it again: Our Friend is NOT fictional!
I'll tell you about Mepsipax. Mepsipax is Our Friend's real name. Oh and one
more thing. Can you tell Ice Mario, the guy who discovered those B-K cheats
to go drink acid. And why don't you guys go visit Conker at the local pub
while you're at it. He needs someone to drive him home after tricking some
sucker into buying him all the beers at the bar.
-Ness554@aol.com
Chad:Mepsipax is his name? Funny, I always pictured him as a 'Lance' or 'Bruce'. The mystery continues...
And by the way, I think I'd rather let Conker walk home. Nothing bad can happen if you choose not to drive drunk. Er...
DeaR PokeMAster Ben!!
hello great site! Keep it up!!!
i Luved the inteveiw1 it was funny! lol!!!
Im' having troubles loadign the site when i opened it up yestedayr it kept coming up wiht DONKEY KONG! what happpened to Pokemon? yoUr site was so cool why diud you shut it d0wn? plz dont get rid of it!
CAn i be staff??? Im very good literacy skills nd know EVERYTHInng about pokemon! (Did you know they also have gold and silver gGAmes that U chan hoo0k up to the Gamecube and is it true their makIng POkeMon games for PLAYSTATION????? Why are nintendo doing that their makeiing so much cool pokemon stuff and will loose lots of money can you tell them not to???!) nYway please tell me if i can join i also have agood sense of humor!!!
ALL YOUR BaSE ARE BELONG 2 US !! ALAHAHAHAHHAHHAH!
-happybob@n-chicken.net
PS. Ahem, sorry. The temptation was too great, and I had little pride to sacrifice in the first place. Suits *YOU*, sir!
Ben: DER HappfgyBoB!
Yes IO enogyed rigHTIng teh inetterveiw, POEKMEMASter caHD wos reealy godd at wighting!! And he has teh bonds with his VENasauR!!1!111!1!11 Hahahaaahhahaa!! I wish taht I had teh bonsd with my Mewoth how is called MEOWTH!!! Lololololool! I thought of teh name myself!!1111!11!11!
Ewe can shore be staff, but onle becoz thsi new ANrdeY person hiss trange. He has no face!! aahhaah!!!!! He sacres mre more than a Arodacteyl!!11!11!1! And yes Ninetndo is makeing teh Pokde mon for Palysatashun 2 becaus emy brothe r saifd so qand he knows lots becos he goes owt to the cityS!!111!11!!
And hahahahahahahahh1h11aaahahh11!!111!a Yu are funy happyBOB!!11!1!11!!
Cheers.
PS Apology accepted. Each time I'm forced to type like that, I feel a piece of intellect disintegrating. It's really quite unpleasant. I wonder how people can actually do that without trying?
Remember me? I just found your site the other day and it rocks! You should
put an application on the site if you need more staff....It'd be cool to be a
part of it.
-Drew
Slush: Well, thank you. As for the application, we don't really need more staff at the moment. Yeah, we just welcomed in Andrey, but that was a rather unexpected situation, and we wanted to jump on the chance to welcome in a person who was our chief rival when we were originally starting out. We're not in the process of hiring at the moment.
You have got to be kidding me! Pokemon over DK? All the work and pain you went through! WAAAHH!! Its terrible! Stop! It's too.. Pokemonish! So, please! Get to your senses before Slush gets back and eats your ass and dips your dick in a test tube and makes ass faced and penis assed kids!
-bigsully20@home.com
Chad: Hahaha! I love this letter for so many reasons.
I'm just wondering, is there a Nintendo of Austrilia way down there, and is your national punishment a boot in the ass?
-JayJay
Ben: As Australia is just really a cheap knock-off of Rand McNallie, we don't actually have a Nintendo of Austrilia. Instead, we have convicts in a really long chain gang passing copies of Conker along the ocean. And if the cartridges get wet, then they get a whipping, not unlike soft serve ice-cream.
As for our capital punishment, the whole giant "boot up the arse" thing was just a silly fabrication.
We actually savagely disembowel people with a spoon while they are tied to a chair and watching Lord Harry. Harsh but fair.
Dear Mr. Slush
I've been visiting Donkey Kong's Jungle Vine for quite some time(after I accidentaly discovered it as I was looking for information on Conker's Bad Fur DayTM)and I could not help notice but ... you guys are sure into Donkey Kong!I've never knew I'll actually bump into true DK fans!DKVine.com showed me a lot about Donkey and his friends I never knew before.As a fan of all Nintendo mascots (especially Mario),your site is the best place I know yet for DK information!The reason I'm concerned about Donkey so much is that because Mario and DK have a very long relation in history.My mind over DK is limited because of my limited number of games which are:Donkey Kong CountryTM on my Super Nintendo Entertaiment SystemTM and Donkey Kong(R) 64TM -(I can't afford too many games these days)-.I promise I'll send you some Art work in the future(and less talk);but in the meantime,could you (and Misters Chad and Ben if possible) answer a "few" questions in mind?
=Note:Some questions have negative emotions towards the website.=
Slush:(Does a spit take) I have to answer ALL of these? Aww, it's 2:13 in the morning, and I'm just getting over a bad illness ... but I will. Mainly because I'm insane and don't follow any common sense towards my well being.
1-Since when you and the others were fans to Donkey Kong?
1: Check the "Editors" page. It describes how each one of us became fans.
2-Do you have all available DK and related games?
2: I don't have the arcade games and such, but I do own every single one that fits our Donkey Kong Universe requirements. My "non DKU" DK games are Donkey Kong Classics for the NES and Mario's Tennis for the Virtual Boy.
3-Is it true that Kiddy is adopted by Chunky?Why?
3: Not quite. You see, in Donkey Kong Country 3, they revealed that Kiddy was Dixie's cousin. This would be physically impossible, since they're two different species of ape. So after debating and arguing about how we could explain this, we came to the conclusion that he may have been adopted by Dixie's aunt and uncle, who just happen to the biological parents of Chunky. Therefore, Chunky and Kiddy are brothers by adoption. Not that it's official or anything, but we pride ourselves in being the Star Trek nerds of the Donkey Kong Universe ... we'll complain about all the continuity errors, and then explain it so we can actually enjoy the games.
4-Why do you guys hate Pokemon this much?Isn't Pikachu a Nintendo mascot like Donkey?I mean,Kirby looks like Jigglypuff and you don't mention him.
4: Kirby rules, that's why. Seriously, I can remember staying up into the wee hours of the morning playing the original Kirby game for the NES with a few of my buddies, just because the programmers were so obviously stoned. We hate Pokemon (well, I do, and so does Our Friend ... not sure about Andrey ... but Chad and Ben have a fetish for the games), and Pikachu in general, because for the last couple years, Nintendo has almost abandoned it's traditioinal mascots for the newer, "hipper", cuter characters that enabled them to rake in the dough like never before. I guess it's just nostalgia versus mainstream culture.
5-Why does your website contain bad stuff?Some kid under thirteen...errr...I mean under seventeen years(For Conker's Bad Fur DayTM) could think you're giving DK a bad name.
5: We know minors visit our website. And we know we're a bunch of low-cultured perverts. The thing is, we've become tired of DK games being treated as "kiddy" games. Yeah, they star a bunch of talking animals. But the sexual innuendo, violence, and hidden jokes suggest otherwise. We're trying to reach an audience that we know is there, but has yet to be tapped, and that's older Donkey Kong/Banjo/Conker (wait, I guess Conker can only be considered for mature gamers now) fans. It's like the playgrounds at fast food establishments. Just because you're an adult doesn't mean they shouldn't build a playground for you too.
6-Why is Dinosaur PlanetTM moved to the GameCubeTM?
6: Because it's become a GAMECUBE game.
7-Are you sure of the stories in the Donkey Kong Land series are related to the console version of DK?The games are not made by RareWareTM.
7: Uh ... yes, they were. Maybe you're thinking about the Donkey Kong arcade update that was released for Game Boy shortly before DKC came out.
8-Why do you accept certain Conker art in the Art Section?Some of them are really disgusting!
8: And that's why we accept them!
9-Is it true that Conker will still be in more Mature games in the future?
Like Conker's Other Fur DayTM on the GameCubeTM?
9: Yes, it's true. It would be a very unwise decision to switch back to the all ages format that was shown in Conker's Pocket Tales at this point. Conker has made the switch, and there's no turning back.
10-(From above) Is Conker's Other Fur DayTM confirmed to the GameCubeTM?
10: More or less. There hasn't been an official announcement, but anonymous Rare employees have confirmed it. Donkey Kong 64 wasn't officially announced for years, but we knew it was coming, basically after the original Donkey Kong Country became hot.
11-What's incommon between Service GamesTM (SEGATM) and RareWareTM?
11: The fact that they're both trademarks, as you've pointed out?
12-In Donkey Kong(R) 64TM ,Cranky mentioned that Diddy's Jet Barrel is a prototype.Does this mean an improved model will come in the next Donkey Kong game on the GameCubeTM?
12: It was probably just a random comment, with no real merit from the programmers behind it.
13-On the booklet of Donkey Kong(R) 64TM ,whenever Cranky mentions Banana Fairy-he goes clumsy over the words.Does this mean something?
13: It's too late at night for me to find my DK64 booklet, so I'll just say "no."
14-What happened to King K. Rool's proud galleon?
14: Don't get us started on the Gangplank Galleon. Chad and I don't agree on the whereabouts of it right now. Chad believes the original one is off with the pirate Kremlings, and I believe the pirate Kremlings brought it back for Donkey Kong Country (GBC). Chad thinks it's a new one. Unless you mean the Gloomy Galleon, or one of the other galleons K. Rool sunk before the Gangplank.
15-I've read somewhere in your website that Mario and Pauline were stranded on a deserted island.Are you stupid or something!?If they were stranded,then where did that construction site came from?The one which Donkey (Cranky) ran to with Pauline to get away from Jumpman (Mario).
15: Sigh. Tsk tsk. Etc. The construction site was on Donkey Kong Island, the island they were stranded on. It was located in Big Ape City, and this was established in Donkey Kong Land.
16-Are you guys ready for any DK or related games on the
Game Boy(R) AdvanceTM and the GameCubeTM?
16: Indeed we are. They'll breathe new life into the site.
Hey!Let me give you a fact:How did Donkey Kong got his name?
-What?Given up already?!Okay,here it goes:When Shieguru Miyamoto wanted to give the gorilla a name,he went mad when he searched for a Japanese word which meant "goofy".Then the Donkey part came to life.Next,he decided that the other name is to be Kong from the famous movie:King Kong.And that is why his name is Donkey Kong.
You should know that there is one thing about DKVine.com which I like a lot:You're continuosly updating that swearing site!
That's a rap!
Yours Sincerly
-Hope (N Forever)
P.S.:Please answer me back respecfully...
Slush (still): Oh, and about your little factoid, I'm not sure if that's how it actually happened. There's varying theories about it, but the one I've generally heard the most is that they picked a word that sometimes meant "stubborn" (Donkey), and Kong was a term for apes and monkeys. They didn't get it from King Kong. That's where King Kong got it from.
Chad: 'ey up, bloody hell. I think even Slush may have his wires crossed. What I always heard was that it was called the Japanese equivalent of "Monkey Kong", but a translation error changed the M to a D, and the name stuck. I would call Nintendo about it, but their phone representatives are usually trained to sound stupid.
Hey, you know I think a lot of people e-mail you? Cuz your name comes first
in all the stuff. And that's why. Here's the next episode.
DKVine Adventures Episode 2: "Rare"
-Ivytoise2001
Chad: Hell yes! Keep those puppies coming. Good work on this one, by the way. You got Gregg's character down pat.
Ben,
Bring it on! Jon and I wanna get our spot on the links page. Yeah, so we'll go through that whole questions and answers thing. So....... what're the questions?
Ben: Pah - nice try. You send us the link first, sonny Jimbo. You email the link first so we check if the site is up to scratch. And next time, try sending me an email address that I can reply back to. And who the hell are you anyway, Mr. Random Mystery Person? No-one ever signs with their name anymore. The President is a demmy-crat. Toys break too easily. Videogames are all graphics and no gameplay. The snow isn't as cold as it was back in my day. Punishments aren't tough enough. Knuckles is cool, but Sonic isn't. No-one comes up with any decent 2-D platformers anymore. Gameboy Advance is too cool. Australia doesn't get enough pointless merchandise.
i know you're online. So don't block everyone :-P
-Drew
Slush: I once unblocked everyone once. Some psycho who must have visited the site wanted to cyber with me, with me being a Kong, and them being a Kremling. That's why I block everyone.
Has anyone else noticed that Rare and Nintendo have different grasps on DK?
In DKCand DK64 he's a big lovable oaf. In Mario Tennis, MK64, Mario Golf,
Mario Party, etc. he is a big raging ape. Which one do you belive in most?
-Silver Face
Chad: Yes, I have noticed the differences. And do you really need to ask which one I agree with?
Dear Aussie Ben,
You're not getting enough email - what's wrong with people?
Yours sincerely,
-A Loyal Fan
Ben: Well, Loyal Fan, that's a good question. What IS wrong with today's generation? To be honest, I'm not quite sure. Perhaps they're all just stupid. Or maybe everyone's fingers got chopped off simultaneously. Whatever the excuse, it's just not good enough. Someone is holding down the team. Who is it? Which one is the weakest link? I've seen better efforts in Daily Radar, and they're no longer operating. Hopefully, this will pick up and I'll get more email than Chad and Slush.
It shouldn't be too hard to get more email than Andrey though. Heh heh.
hi, on karbine kaos and stalagmite frights,[donkeykong land 3] it says to use web platforms to climb up,and i do not know how to. any help or advice please?
-thanks from kevin [12]
Slush:It's been awhile since I played a Donkey Kong Land game, but if memory serves me right, you press selected, control the floating web ball with the D-Pad, and then press A or B or something to make the web platform come alive. If I'm wrong, THEN I APOLOGIZE.
Mewthree is powerful because he can lift buffalo.... the pizza is drying on
the towels.... the towels are becoming breeding grounds for "Special" Pikachu
Edition Veterans... ahhhhh!!!!!! the towels are becoming damp again...
yay... *fills bathtub with self proclaimed "Ginger Beer"* *throws Lanky Kong
plush in beer* Mewthree is strongderder than Mewtwo.... mm hmm... Thanks for
your time,
-Dakota Anthony Trevino
Chad: I love this job. Wait, hang on, I'm not getting paid...
Dear Mr. Slush
Doe is hungry, Doe needs food. Doe will be hungrier if you delete this e-mail.
Anyway, I've heard that the levels that didn't make it in Banjo-Kazooie were put in Banjo-Tooie, with the exception of Fungus Forest. Could Mt. Fire Eye be what is now Hailfire Peaks? Are there any other worlds that were thrown in BT? Can you tell me? Is Doe really human? Do you hate pizza guy DJs who take pictures of your car and stick them on the internet?
-~BaronKrusha
Slush: Shut up.
Sorry, didn't know you were saving it. But, yeah, I was hoping for a
response so I sent it again. To make it up, I'll write an actual Letter(And
on a side note, can I use some of your character pictures for the site? I
swear to God I'll put them on my own server and give you guys credit):
Pokémon 3 is GOOD! Except for Pikachu & Pichu, that is. I could barely
stand the first two Pikachu films, but the third was unbearable. The main
feature, though...Holy crap. That was magnificently pulled off.
The idea of the original BFD ending is somewhat intriguing, if not more
depressing than the actual one. I'm guessing it was changed for sequel
purposes like everyone else.
What's your guess for a DKU game that could be revealed for GCN at E3?
Methinks Dinosaur Planet will appear, though things could be different so
that it's no longer part of the DKU.(The Star Fox Adventures rumor is utter
bull, though.)
I'm working on a website, and I'll post a link when I feel there's something
worth seeing. Let's just say I've gotten some inspiration from you guys.
-Behonkiss
Chad: If you give us credit, then sure - have at the character pics. They're Rare's anyway. I just screencapped and cropped them.
Yes, I really enjoyed the movie. Pikachu and Pichu was rather unbearable, but I had bet going with a friend of mine as to what Smeargle sounded like (which I won), so it's forgivable. The bulk of the movie, though, was great. More of a trippy anime plot than a normal Pokemon movie one.
Yeah, but Conker could, in theory, come back via Gregg. There may be rules with suicide though. Still, I thoroughly love the current CBFD ending and wouldn't have it changed for the world.
Dinosaur Planet and Mario Kart GCN are my guesses for Eł.
I am dying to play the original Donkey Kong or even the original Donkey Kong
Jr. Is there a wesbite out there that offers a knock-off download of either
of the two? How about a cartridge for the Gameboy or Gameboy Advance when
it comes?
I love classic games so if you can help, it would be greatly appreciated:
Zazzon
Donkey Kong
Mr. Do
Pengo
Games like that. Thanks again.
-Rock
Slush: Sure! We'll help you illegally download games! That's always fun! Breaking the law rules!.
I'm definitely not going to send you hate mail for making that feature on
cutesy DKU games. Even though I still enjoy them, I agree that BFD was much
better structured. And luckily, it's likely it won't be the last time this
style is used. Rare may have actually been trying to do that sort of game
all along on N64, but weren't able to until the very end, where they
utilized as much of the system's potential as possible. With Gamecube
looming on the horizon, it's likely that they(as well as other
companies)will make games like BFD. Future Banjo and DK games may include
the standard item-collecting and cuteness, but they're likely to have some
emotional scenes as well, considering that GCN seems to be the best of the
three systems preparing for war. Maybe Miyamoto may be going this way as
well. The Zelda N64 games have done this sort of thing, and he has said
that the Mario GCN game will be more mature somehow. The Gamecube is really
going to increase story and emotion in games, and BFD is likely just a sneak
preview.
-Behonkiss
Chad: You again? Wasn't the out-of-commision Oddities feature enough? Eh? Oh, no worries, you're me besht mate, aye.
What the hell am I talking about? Anyway, very good letter. I think that the whole speech aspect of Conker allowed us to relate to the characters much better than text could. This could be why I was so moved by the CBFD ending. On the other end of the spectrum, the DKC2 main characters NEVER talked, and I was moved by that ending as well. I guess it's just a fine balance in how well you can make a person relate to a character.
What is this "Jail" I keep hearing about in the Time
Vine, I don't remember any "Jail" in the instruction
manual. I don't see any "Jail" in any of the DK
games, or the "Jail" in Mario games where Bowser and
Wario are kept. The only "Jail" I seen is K. Lumsy's
and it's not even there anymore, the cage I mean.
Unless you can prove there is an actual Jail on DK
Island and Mushroom Kingdom, I will go with the theory
of the Cranky and K. Rool are friends from DKL or the
theory of villains getting thier arses kicked over and
over again but never go away.
-JayJay
Slush: Think about it. Does it make any sense that the Kongs would beat K. Rool and crew ... and then just leave them there? There has to be some sort of law force working, even if they are apes. They're civilized apes, damnit.
Hey, Jon here with some questions. I hope no one minds that this contain major BFD spoilers... so if you haven't played it I suggest you skip this.
Anyways, onto my letter. I've recently rented BFD and beat it. And I must say... IT'S THE BEST N64 GAME I'VE EVER PLAYED! Might even be Rare's best desicion ever besides taking the DK franchise into their own hands. But anyways, I have a few questions about Conker's BFD.
1) What's your favorite song/some of your favorites? For me I'd have to say U-Bend Blues, Count Batula's Demise, Rock Solid, Uga Buga, Lava Boarding, and Hung Over. It's hard to decide on just one...
2) What's your favorite sub-chapter of the game? I myself can't decide on mine.
3) And your least favorite? I'd have to say Clang's Lair for me. I hate 3-D water levels. Hate 'em. Well maybe not, but I'm not too fond of them.
4) Has Robin Beanland composed for any other Rare games? I think he's new, but I'm not sure.
Right, you guys have your fun and all that, and I'll probablly see you some time next week.
-Jon
Chad: 1. By far, Credits, the windy simplistic music that plays as the credits roll. I could listen to that for hours (and I do).
2. That's really tough. If the cinema subchapters count, then the ending cinema wins by far. If not, then I'd probably go with one of the boss battles, or the Casualty Department. That Tediz doctors cinema is classic.
3. Yeah, Clang's Lair was rather annoying. It also had that "ultra-darkness" factor going for it, which can be a big pain if there's a glare on your screen.
4. I'm not sure who composed Jet Force Gemini, but the styles are very similar. Other than possibly JFG, I don't know of any other games he's composed.
I have nothing better to do, so I will waste my time
asking you, yes you the camera with fishing lines,
some questions.
1.What were you when you were alive?
2.Who were you?
3.Do you ever get mistreated?
4.Do cameras play games?
5.If you ever got a job at playboy, would you accept?
6.Let's see how smart haunted cameras are:
There are 5 places, Donkey Kong Universe, Mushroom
Universe, Zelda Time period, Pokemon World and
Dreamland. List them from smallest to largest if:
-There are at least 2 and more places larger than the
Mushroom Universe
-Pokemon World is smaller then the Mushroom Universe
and Dreamland
-Dreamland is neither the smallest nor largest
-JayJay
P.S My breath smells like Garlic bread.
Our Friend: Great, I just love when I get letters from jackasses. Come to think of it, I only get letters from the jackasses.
1: I was human.
2: My name was Our Friend, even back when I was a human. Last name was Friend. First name was Our. I had cruel parents.
3: It depends on what you're definition of mistreated is. Yeah, Chad feeds me and generally lets me do my own thing, but I reallly want to get my own place. That'll never happen, since somehow Chad owns a slave deed for me. I think he just wrote it himself, but I'm too damn lazy to ask.
4: Yes, we do. I don't care for them at times, but then some days it's all I want to do. Anything with Ted the Boat Builder in it is gold (i.e. Conker's Pocket Tales).
5: Is your name JayJay?
6: I'm bagging your mom right now.
Donkey Kong is mad that his new game is just a remake.
-NES Boy
Chad: Fictional characters get angry easily, do they?
Hey, Chad. Just wanted to say that the site is still great, and I've got some
comments/questions.
--You said you will not buy a PS2. Is there a reason why? Not a Playstation
fan? I have an N64 and a Playstation, and I'm definitely getting a PS2 as
soon as I get the money together. I mean, you can't overlook all the features
on that thing. It's incredible. Plus, FFX will be coming out for that system,
and I'm a FF fanatic, so I'll have to get the PS2 just for that one game.
(Just like I got a N64 just for DK64). If you like RPG games, you would love
the FF series. I don't like RPG's with only one character, which means no
Zelda for me. My cousin got the new game, and I just wasn't impressed by it
at all. Then again I was tramuatized by the first Link game for NES. It was
just *such* a pain in the ass.
--I haven't played it, but Paper Mario looks interesting. And *another* Mario
Party game? Geez, I didn't even think the first one was that amusing! When
will it end? On another Mario related topic, did you ever play the game Mario
Is Missing for NES? I rented it once, and it just struck me as odd.
--Just out of curiousity, what is the *worst* video game you've ever played?
For me it was Circus Caper (I don't think anyone has ever heard of this...)
for NES. I swear that game is impossible. I couldn't even get past the first
level. In the instruction booklet they list the other levels, and my sister
and I are convined the idiots who made the game made up the levels just to
get people to think they could actually get there. It's just a very stupid
game.
Okay, I think I've babbled on enough. Anyway, in closing, I'd just like to
say I think you guys are great!!
-*Lark*
Chad: Yeah, I'm just not a big Sony fan. I get all the gaming goodness I need on Nintendo consoles, so there's really no reason for me to fork over for another system. And after importing GBA, I don't think I can afford to either...
Ugh, don't get me started on Mario party 3. I think I'll give that one a rent at most. Ugh. And yes, I played Mario is Missing (there's only an SNES version to my knowledge), and I really liked it.
I don't think I can answer that one. I've played some real stinkers in my day... hmm... Ren and Stimpy: Veediots on Game Boy. There were only three bloody levels, and the controls were just awful. Plus, Ren kept yelling "I'm so HAPPY!" at the most inopportune moments.
Chad,
I deeply despise you website in saying that the
original Donkey Kong games aren't part of the DK
universe. That's like telling your parent's that there
not part of your family. Yes, they were 2-D and they
were twenty some-odd years ago. But they were great
games, they were. And their story lines fit in well
with the newer story lines. One other thing too. I
like the Donkey Kong games, old and new. But they were
just that, games. You try to explain every little
detail of the game as though it was real. "What
happened to the trees in the Angry Aztec?" Get out of
the house and take a break from the computer. Your as
bad as those little Pokemon freaks that run around.
Your obsessed. And watch your language when your on
your site, especially when your talking about DK. They
are good clean video games that don't need your
vulgarities dirtying it up like they did to Conker.
Stop talking to your veiwers the way you do because
their are a lot more of us than there are of you...
-chadwick_200@yahoo.com
Chad: This letter really struck me as funny. If you don't like our DKU ommissions, then tough beans. Go make your own site. And watch my language, you say? Well, sir, with Conker out making the DKU a worst-case-scenario of "M", I feel it's justified. Besides, I only say shit uncensored when it's on Conker pages. Oops.
And by the way, I thought you'd like to know that I had a good laugh at your last sentence. Thanks for the pick-me-up.
Hey You Bald Stick Guy
A ton crap for you to read:
Your wrong about DK64 being all happy as you stated in
your Death to Cutesy thing. "Everything is very
happy-go-lucky with unnecessarily day-glo colors."
Stated by you, you, YOU. Sure the game suck due to
too much collecting, bad multiplayer, bad mini games,
5 Kongs made it look small, easy bosses, and being too
easy itself. It has good music, environment, smooth
graphics and more, but it could have used more levels,
more moves to learn, more animal buddes, ability to
use barrel moves and animal buddies all over da
island, more harder bosses like Mad Jack etc, but most
importantly more Frustration.
Back to my point, sure some levels like the DK Island,
Jungle Japes, Fungi Forest(day time), and what ever
place that was called where you start were all too
happy; but the rest were dark and spooky like Jungle
Japes(Cranky's Lab Area gives you the mad scientist
feeling), Frantic Factory, Gloomy Galloon, Fungi
Forest(night time), Creepy Castle, K. Lumsy's Cage and
Crocodile Island. Angry Aztic and Crystal Caves gave
me the in between feeling. Sure it wasn't a Majora's
Mask's intensity with a Moon that had a cool face, but
there was intensity with the threat of the
Blast-0-Matic killing all inhabitants of DK Island,
maybe even going as far as to Banjo and Conker, but
the most intense part was the 40 or less minutes to
shut down the Blast-O-Matic. And let's not forget the
ending where Candy seduced K. Rool in an E game.
-JayJay
Chad: Ah, JayJay, the Cassius to my Brutus. Actually, that analogy makes no sense.
Anyway, there was nothing technically wrong with DK64 (aside from some cacky hit detection and floaty jumping). I just think that they didn't succeed in conveying a mood very well. Gloomy Galleon was the only place I really felt a part of the game, and that's partly because of DKC2 nostalgia. It was a good game, but it just didn't succeed in enveloping me in its sweaty polygonal folds. On the other side of the spectrum, I still hate playing that "Zombies!" chapter of CBFD. It's great fun, but it still scares me sh-tless.
Yes, Rare always stick suggestive things near the ends of their "E" games, so Candy's sex simulation was standard fare. I don't think the ESRB plays the games all the way through, which is why Rare can get away with this. Brilliant move on their part.
Oh.hi. Add my How Diddy Kong Racing should be web site to links or I'll find
you and slap you with a dead fish. Or maybe I won't. Also, AOL keyword FTP is
the crappiest shit ever. What do you use. OK. Bye.
-Chiphead
Chad: Yes, maybe you won't. Unless you have an exceptionally long fish, in which case you probably could. As for your "real" question, Ben uses Cute FTP, Slush and I use AceFTP, and I'll be buggered if I know what Andrey uses. Ops used pretty CGI forms to update. It's back to the basics now.
i think any1 who thinks a Banjo or DK game is bad is an idiot. When will
that monkey Josh appear in a game he is silly hehe, and witch is better
DK land 2 or3
-Lanky
Chad: I think Mario Tennis and Mario Party 2 were bad. Color me "idiot". Donkey Kong Land III is probably better, for originality's sake. The storyline was fresh, and you had the Time Trials when all was said and done.
Chad can I download games from this site to my computer?
-joanps@nefcom.net
Chad: Sure, if you consider Heroes of Kazaam a "game".
Hallo!
I recently stumbled across your website and was somewhat intrigued. I'm not a big fan of Donkey Kong (for shame) but I do own the three DKC games for SNES. I love the games, I really do. But I've never been obsessed with monkeys. Baboo.
Anyhow, the point of this email is to ask you this: Do you make the bamboo border graphics for DKVine? I really do love jungle-themed things and I'm currently making a (nother) website which is supposed to be jungle-themed, seeing as I love jungle-themed things as stated only seconds ago. I do make my own graphics, but alas, I've been so damn lazy lately. I was wondering if you allow those bamboo borders to be used by strangers on websites which will probably never get more then 20 visitors. Is it at all possible? Or shall they be 'trademarks' of the DKVine website? I really don't mind your answer. If you say yes, I'll smile and thank you. If you say no, I will throw banana slices at you and make my own, which will require energy equal to the energy being used to write this drawn-out email. So, what say you?
I hope to hear from you soon, and great work on the site. (Send my wishes to the rest of the 'team'. And if you have pictures of your asses, I'll gladly kiss them some more.)
All the best.
-Jodie G.-R.
Chad: Yeah, I did the bamboo border things, and unfortunately I can't let you take them. If I said yes to you, everybody would want them and my 45 minutes in Infini-D last December would be in vain. And I don't have pictures of our backsides on-hand, but the fact that you asked us before stealing images shouldn't go unrewarded... I'd like you to know that you were originally to be awarded the Mr. Mooney Award (of triumph) but SirNick's idiocy blew right past this one. Sorry!
As I wrote on IGN.com' GCN boards:
"First off, In Banjo-Tooie, Sabreman says that "Sabre wulf chased me here" and "Maybe I'll Ride a Dolphin" in hailfire peaks. Next, in Dinosaur Planet, the main charater's name is Sabre, and he's a wolf. Also, dinosaur planet is going to be for gamecube, which used to be called Dolphin.
Making any sense to anybody? Thats the connection in what Sabreman says in Banjo-Tooie. This is in coordination with the dkvine.com's theory about Dinosaur Planet being in the DKU (Donkey kong games, Banjo Kazooie games, etc.)
Also, I believe Dinosaur Planet is the sequel to Sabreman, because of this connection. "
-sz_agent@hotmail.com
Chad: This would work out, aside from the fact that Dinosaur Planet was still slated for N64 until around Banjo-Tooie's release. There's no way the team could have had such foresight on another project that they're unrelated to in the first place. I think Sabreman's comments were, if anything, indicative of a GCN Sabre Wulf game.
no, but really, were you literally eaten alive by minnows?
signed,
-petridish
Chad: Yes. I was literally eaten alive by minnows.
The quality level of this site has gone from very efficient to
extremely poor. What's to blame? I think a more appropriate question would be
who's to blame...
There's four people working on the site now. When you and Chad alone
were working on it, more work was done and the content of the site was at
least existent. Between the four of you, an update only needs to be completed
TWICE A WEEK.
And don't tell me that you don't have time to update twice a week. I
have a friend who owns an online business, goes to school, has a social life,
and two part-time jobs that alternate almost every other day, but he still
finds time to update his homepage a few times a week.
I think the problem here is laziness. Seriously, I don't want to see
this site go down the toilet, like I've seen so many else do. But when you go
a few days without updating - and when you finally do, it's a biography - it
won't suffice for people like me. Here at DKVine, being lazy is a compliment;
I would like to see a recovery, and have more effort go into the site.
-SirNick
Slush: Well, don't you have all the facts? I'm sorry if our hobby isn't meeting up to your personal standards, but the fact is, we simply can't update as much anymore. There are a variety of reasons for this for all the staff members, including, as you mentioned, social lives, jobs, college, high school, etc. Personally, I have other online commitments that are more important than Donkey Kong's Jungle Vine, and I simply can't devote as much time to it as I'd like to.
I also apologize that you don't care for our updates when we do have original content, but what are we supposed to do right now? We launched the site at a time that was on the verge of Donkey Kong 64, B-T information was starting to leak out, and the N64 still had a good bit of life in it. Now, everything's so hush hush thanks to all the new games being avaliable on systems that are still being kept underwraps, we can't go on for hours and hours about the next Donkey Kong game anymore, because quite frankly, we have no idea what it's going to be about. Plus, we have a lot more to worry about at the moment than which Kong is the gayest, or which Kremling has the best CGI design.
Chad: Swanky and Kutlass, respectively.
Slush: Things will pick up, I can tell you that. This site just isn't our life though, and we never signed a contract that said we'd update everyday with five different Feature-length pages. We love the site, we love our readers, and we love what we cover, but how much time do you actually expect us to devote on something as trivial as computer generated apes and bears?
Take the Mr. Mooney Award. You deserve it ever so much. Ye-us!
And with that, we end Letters on a negative note.
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