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10/07/00
The Mooney Award of 9/19/00 is mine! AHAHAHAHA!
First the mooney, then the mushroom kingdom, then DK ISLAND!!!
Oh BTW, El burro Kong tiene gusto de los cocos del caramelo!
That's it for now. Stay Tuned to get more from Mr. Little Luigi.
See Ya,
Little Luigi
Slush: Donkey Kong's coconuts taste like caramel? Egads, man!
[Unable to display image]
Dear Chad,
If possible, would you please post my Bonkey Kong picture in the DK
Jungle Vine so that people can come across it and laugh at it? You can use
Bonkey in any of your stories if you'd like.
Thank you for your thoughtful response. I enjoyed your kind comments.
You respected my different opinions and I will respect yours. I'd just like
to say... THANK YOU! If only all humans can respect each others opinions
we'd all live happier. I have to congradulate you guys on you're very
creative and accurate theories; I enjoyed the Time Vine a lot. Thank you
very much.
Sincerely,
?????? ????
P.S.: Don't forget to visit thehungersite.com daily! Here's the link: The Hunger Site : Donate Food for Free to Hungry People in the World
Chad: AOL embedded images only work with mutual AOL users, you sod. Anyway, we posted your Bonkey Kong picture in Artwork ages ago. And thanks for the compliments. We enjoy compliments. In fact, we enjoy them enough to turn your hunger site thing into a working link again. Everybody visit it! Perhaps!
Now you've done it! You've really sicken me and my parents out! If you don't
stop making those sick Pikachu pictures. I'm gonna start that crap too! I'm
gonna start making sick pictures of Conga getting killed! How do ya like dem
apples huh?
-Ness554@aol.com
Slush: The cardinal rule of visiting our site if your under parental authority is to never show anything we do to them. I'm sure no parents out there with any sort of moral value will understand the cuteness of giving Pikachu fatal enemas or having dogs chew at his testicles. If we've disgusted you with our Pikachu pictures, then we've done our job. I'm particular good at disturbing people with gore. Today I began setting up my Halloween decorations, and I think I'm disgusting my neighbors with my assortment this year. I only use the good stuff (i.e. decorations that feature loads of blood and decayed flesh), not ghosts with sheets and Jack O' Lanterns. How can you get gorey with sheet ghosts and Jack O' Lanterns? Finally, your Conga threat doesn't scare me. Any Conga is good Conga.
three questions:
1-What is the name of your dog (your dog's legs appear in the last movie)???
2-Do you have a little bro or sis (there are some bare feet in the same
movie)???
3-Well actually there were two questions, but 1 comentary, in the movie
where dk is kicked of, there is a shadow, your hands grabbing dk to let him
go, right???
Santiago, santiago_85@hotmail.com
P.S. Try not to put these in the movies
Chad: Three questions, eh? Oh, they're about the Farmer Donkey movie. Wonderful.
1. Those weren't my dog's feet. Satan had stopped by for a cup of sugar. I asked him nicely to get out of the shot, but he is the Prince of Darkness, after all.
2. I have a younger (see: bitchy) sibling, yes. But those sexy- sexy feet in the video belonged to yours truly. Odd how I only seem to have four toes per foot, isn't it?
3. right??? right!!~!@2
P.S. Great, now I have to cut my completely unneccesary penis shot from the next one. Damn you, Lopez.
Yes, it has been quite a while since I wrote a letter in to yu two, but heres
a barage of random DKU questions, for absolutely no reason.
1: if Monster Rancher killed Pokemon, would you fall down in a sudden fit of
worship for Suezo, Mocchi, and all of the other monsters I'm too lazy to
name? What about Digimon?
2: Have you ever wanted to catch a missingno?
3: Who's your least favorite kong?
4: C'mon, kill Diglett!
5: What is EWJ doing in the no hopers pile in DKC 2?
6: Do you know what a Zorjil is?
7: who's your favorite K. Rool identity?
8: Did they cancel the DKC show yet?
-ADReyes@aol.com
Slush: Oh boy, it's the old question routine. A fine staple of any mailbag. I suppose I better get started.
1: No. If they killed Pokemon, I would have to shift my intense hatred somewhere.
2: I caught a Missingno., as I do own Pokemon Red Version. Yeah, I bought it when it first came out, before all the hype and merchandise. I beat it, and haven't touched it since.
3: Oh, I suppose it would have to be poor Tiny by default. I don't hate Tiny, I just like the other Kongs more.
4: I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL FIRST!
5: Isn't that the guy from Webster?
6: One of those New Age cults from California?
7: Kaptain K. Rool
8: Beats me. Hopefully.
Sometimes at your site, there's a box with a cross on it, what the hell is
that??? When you click it, you go to www.thecounter.com, what??? Well,
anyway, you haven't replied in a time. Where are you???
Santiago, santiago_85@hotmail.com
P.S. About the broken link, i tried a million times that night and didn't
worked, but after i wrote the letter to you it was fixed
Chad: Yeah, that little gem would be our counter from thecounter.com. Their service really sucks and is completely unreliable. Also, if thecounter's server is down our entire page will refuse to load on Netscape. We're going to switch counters soon, don't worry. Sorry for the inconvenience.
P.S. Yeah, it's a bitch. Hey, two slightly offensive post scripts in a row! YES!
Chad has one artwork, oh wait, you said even if there's an artwork, sorry.
Well, you can do a bunch of biografies, to do more artworks of course; post
my artwork, chad has it; get a CHATROOM, i know you won't; well i guess
these updates aren't good enough so i'll SEE YA tomorrow
Santiago
santiago_85@hotmail.com
P.S. Why don't you or chad ever tell your ages, are you 30 or something???
Slush: Wow. Some people just can't take a joke. We weren't bashing your artwork, we just figured people were tired of Artwork in general considering we updated about sixteen days straight with it. Of course, it's better than some sites. For example, there's this one site that's an IGN affiliate, and they haven't updated since earlier this year. At least we try and give people something everynight (if possible).
P.S. Yes. I'm a 42 year old pedophile.
Banjo and Kazooie
Bye Bye Kaplooey
Give the Mr. Mooney
To someone else more looney!
Someone who takes a balooney
And suck the helium out and talks.. looney.
Someone who looks like Mickey Rooney.
Someone who watches way too many cartooneys.
Someone that looks like a peice of glooey.
Signed,
Little Luigi
Chad: This attempt was rather sparse.
I'd say it was a farce.
Not quite worthy of a parse,
But I'll give it the inevitable arse. Ye-us.
Do you ever get the feeling that life is full of missed opportunities, for instance, not securing www.rarse.com?
Damn you Richard.
-HappyBob
Slush: I try to look at the bright side of things. For example, http://www.greenporncity.com is still up for grabs. If this Jungle's Vine thing doesn't pan out, I can always fall back on that. Realistically, it would be easy to write pornographic scenarios as well. Observe:
Federal Express Guy: I've got a package for you, ma'am.
Woman: Hold on, I'm in the shower! Can you just place your package on my bed?
Federal Express Guy: Where exactly is your bedroom? I can't seem to find it, and my package is rather large.
Woman: Let me get out and show you. Oh my, I've seem to misplaced my towel...and my clothes!
I'm a genius.
captain chad....i send my email wondering one great question...is it true that you are as a god in every way?...the thought came to me back in nineteen ought six...i was driving a dumptruck and suddenly a large building fell on me...course people were stronger in those days so i was dancin the jitterbug that very night...but while those thousands and thousands of tons of mortar cascaded around my cranium...i began wondering could chad...co-webmaster of the largest repository of donkey kong and one armed donny related trivia known in all existance be the same chad who once saved 6 kittens from sure death at the hands of an evil and twisted container of bubble tape??? could he be the chad what climbed the mountains ...what killed the evil seas and who even conquered the mighty moon and made it stop eating elvis records....welll my friends the answer is...no....the chad that is teh one we know and indeed love....he is a god.......well no...he is a freeway.....interstate 10 has reared its ugly head and disguized itself as a mere mortal...and now it does things...evil things....stave yourself from the freeways....they cant help you now...the evil residential streets have overrun them...go chad...be free as all suspended roadways were meant to be...do not be confined to what they say is true.....but does a pencil of the same color not have wood?? no my friends...they have no wood...for they are the lost souls fo past donkey kong games ...who have been disregarded by owners not fit to travel on such a fine road system...you cant dsbe serious cancel mash...what the f%^k is that ??? no....optimus we cant let the streets win...lay down unto them a mighty ass whompin' so as to make them feel the rage of the thousand camel hearts that power you...we can not be free of the hair what clave unto our feet...it must be nurtured...and groomed...yes grooming....our nations favorite past time...we love out little face pencils so much...but would you love a razor? would you like to be cut??? ehh boy??? cut you good!!! and then diddy kong saved the day....or did he.....
Kenny Hawkins
ps capital letters are against my religion...as are spell cheskers
Chad: I'll admit, I am not the Chad who had so valliantly killed the mighty seas, nor an I the Chad who braved the moon and saved the Records of Presley. I am a simple man, or simple values. And my values are those of silly putty. The residential streets are covered with Silly Putty, which perfectly explains why they are taking over Interstate 10 and other pop favorites of the highway system. With the majestic power of Silly Putty at the helm, asphalt is virtually unstoppable. And 'tis true these disregarded and disowned games of Donkey Kong lore find home on the rural suburban roadways, but they are cradled in the warm bosom of Silly Putty, and shant be forgotten. I would not like to be cut, as I get enough of that in my bidaily shaving session. And toilet paper I use to caulderize the wound, I do I do. Toilet paper I use, I do. And Diddy Kong was the one who saved the day, not I.
P.S. I follow no such religion, sorry.
Well, it's not the end of the news dought that we've been waiting for,
but it appears that EVERYONE loves Galactic Pinball. :-)
Ben
Slush: What? How can that be possible when nobody has played it?
Dear Chad can you please make me an ebay screen name:
Screen Name: Dr.Pyro63-72 (pick a number) don't ask.
Password: (censored)
E-mail: firestarter@robot.com
Address: (censored)
Phone: (censored)
B-Day: 06/01/80
Age:20
Call me if you need any more info. I need this asap please. You don't have to but I made it so all you have to do is copy and paste. I don;t care if you know my password. And I won the Banjo-Kazooie Doll.
firestarter@nycny.net
Chad: What do I look like, boy? Your bloody chambermaid? I mean... congratulations on the Banjo doll and all, but geez. Create your own damned account.
I just thought up another way to kill pikachu!!
DK dails Pikachu's number.
Phone Rings
Pikachu: Pika (hello?)
DK: Wazzup!
Pikachu: Pika? (huh?)
DK head goes through phone line and pops out of Pikachu's end.
Dk bites off Pikachu's head.
DK: Hmm... tastes like chicken.
The End
-ChuckRoast
Slush: Hmm. Well, I have to say don't quit your day job, Palumbo.
Sorry for disturbing you.
vanillagorilla-zimblot1@juno.com
Our Friend: You damn well better be.
I ahuge fan of the DKC series and especially the music. There aren't really any mp3s on the internet (well, a couple). I was wondering if you knew anywhere where I could purchase a CD of the music (if they even still sell it). I am most interested in a DKC2 cd. Thank you.
dargor@idirect.com
Chad: Nintendo Power's catalogue still sells the DKC3 soundtrack, I believe. You can easily find the Donkey Kong Country CD (called "DK Jamz") on an auction site like www.ebay.com. The DKC2 one, however, is a bit more tricky. Earlier this year I found the CD on eBay after five years of searching. Just keep checking regularly, and when you find it, give an insanely large high bid. It's what I did!
I like DK he's cool.
eszeifried@home.com (Eric Szeifried)
Slush: And Jesus is alright with me.
A 3rd E-Mail to everybody's favorite friend? Man, I feel whack tonight
for some strange reason. Anyway, Here's a few questions for you to ask
politely, which I already know you won't, because you don't have what it
takes to reply to all my questions in a nice manner! HAHAHA!
Our Friend: I didn't want to take your second letter at all. It was just too retarded for me to worry about. Here, though, you have numbered questions. I'll try to answer them in as belittling a way as possible.
1- Why are you a camera man?
1. Because I'm Hindu and didn't follow Dharma in my past life, so I got a crappy reincarnation. Or that's a lie and I don't feel like telling you my backhistory.
2- Do you like your job? Why?
2. No. It's rather obvious why.
3- Are you mean because Chad and Slush don't pay you a cent?
3. I'm mean because Chad and Slush interrupt my intercourse sessions with their incessant begging for screenshots and scans. You'd think they could use the scanner on their own, but noooo.
4- Is there EVER a chance where you'll become nicer?
4. Well, your letters sure aren't helping, f-ckface.
5- Do you have something against Slush?
5. See number 3.
6- Do you know that you can't reply to any of my questions nicely, and I
am absolutely sure you can't answer all politely.
6. Bring that question up to a "comprehensible" status, then ask it again.
7- What would you do if I E-Mail you again?
7. Delete it.
8- Are you mad yet?
8. Would you like some tea, Alice?
9- Who's your favorite Kong?
9. It sure as hell isn't Vanilla Gorilla.
10-Who's meaner? Conker, Eminem, or Our Freind?
10. The latter.
11-Do you like anyhting about Diddy, Dixie, DK, or any of the Kongs?
11. A bit.
12- Are you Chad?
12. No.
13- Are you sick of my questions?
13. Yes.
14-Do you like Charile Sex Muffin more than me?
14. No.
15-Did you know that on Sept.30th, Aaron Tippin's Kiss this was at #3 on
the Billboards?
15. No.
16-Do you drive?
16. Yes. I drive, despite the fact that I have no arms or legs.
17-Why don't you reply to messages on the Bulletin Board?
17. I do.
18-Do you like the Packers?
18. What's that supposed to mean? I'M NO HOMO!
19-Have you ever heard or seen Our Enemy?
19. Not as such.
20- DK JungleVine
20. Never heard of it.
21- You can't reply to everything nice abotu this or anything on a
message with this from it!.
21. See number 6.
22-I hear you hate people writing to you.
22. You hear correctly.
23-Please forgive me, ChuckRoast, Jon, Slush, and Chad for this message
I'm writing.
23. Why did you send me to this if you're forgiving them?
24-BYE BYE!
24. Leave my field of view.
These are my questions to you, Our Friend! Maybe I'll E-Mail you
tommorrow on Sept.30th, and the next day, AND THE NEXT DAY, UNTIL I
E-MAIL YOU 50-100 MESSAGES A DAY!
BWWAWBBBAAAWBAWAAAAAAAAHAA
AAABWAAABWHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHA
HAHAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHAHH
HHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAA!!!! Charile Sex Muffin's rumored future new website: www.32.com
ADIOS!
vanillagorilla-zimblot1@juno.com
Sadly this is my last letter(although your probably are rejoicing lol)
But I have a question.When will they battle it out for the last
time? I mean, after mario kart(I hate that corny name, as if mario won or
was the only contestant)then there was mario party, then super smash bros.,
then mario party 2, now mario tennis!?!?!?! When will it end!?!?!?
Gr8dbatr
ps, did mario ever meet k.rool
Chad: Nintendo considers Donkey Kong as part of their "Mario Series", even though the opposite is true. Mario was introduced in the game, Donkey Kong. He's technically a Donkey Kong character. Anyway, I doubt Nintendo, Hudson, HAL, and Camelot will stop using Donkey in the Mario-titled games. He seems to have found a niche in the Mario group, which is keeping himself alienated from them all.
P.S. Not that I know of.
You have no taste what so ever you freak!!!!! DKC TV RULES!!!!!!
-Ness554@aol.com
Slush: Beats me if this was supposed to be serious or sarcastic. I did find it amusing that I was called me a freak, as in somebody that is markedly unusual or abnormal. I can't be that abnormal, because I know of maybe five people all together that like the show.
It is I, Moooojo Jojo! I have seen your site, and have looked at the
various pages! There are many monkeys and other primates on your
various pages of your site which I have been looking at, but none of the
aforementioned monkeys or other primates are as clever or as diabolical
as I, Mooojo Jojo!
I have seen many profiles of monkeys and other primates on your pages,
and I plan to enlist the help of these various monkeys and other
primates using my superior intellect, which there is no way simple fools
like you could care to match, as my intellect is far more superior,
being more superior than that of an average human being, as well as
other creatures! These monkeys and other primates that you call "Kongs"
will instantly desire to help me, as it is a sworn pact made by primates
that if one needs help than the other will help them for the help that
is needed by the aforementioned primate!
Why do I ask for the help of these simple-minded Kongs, do you ask?
Well, the reason is simple, perhaps so simple that your inferior
intellect could not begin to comprehend the pure genius behind my
diabolical scheme! I will use the entire Kong family to CAPTURE THE
POWERPUFF GIRLS! Yes, I, Moooojo Jojo shall capture the Powerpuff Girls
using the help of the Kong family! It is we who shall do it! And then,
once I have captured the Powerpuff Girls, there will be nothing to stop
me from taking over the world! The world will be free for taking, and I
shall be the one who will take it! I, Mojo Jojo, will take the world,
and then I shall rule the world which I have taken possession! There is
no stopping me now! Ahahahahahaha!
Yours sincerely,
Mojo Jojo
Chad: That's it, I'm calling the Mayor.
I read your Mario Tennis Review. But cheer up, Chad. Try beating the game
with EVERY character (even if it means soiling yourself or not), hold the R
button while selecting your character, and lo and behold! Three brand new
tournaments! The Rainbow Cup, the Moonlight Cup, and the Planet Cup! I heard
this in the Mario Tennis Strategy Guide by Prima (it's very small), but they
never describe what courts are used for the tournaments. The Mushroom Cup had
the Hard Courts, the Flower Cup had the Clay Court, and the almighty Star Cup
had the Grass Court. By the way, here's an update for you guys. Update the
Time Vine with not only Mario Party 2 info, but pictures of what's going on
at the corresponding time periods! The ones on the Games would have
Screenshots of the games themselves, while the others on births and stuff
would have hand drawn pictures (I.E., The Kremling force power busting up
into the hot surface of the Earth). I'm not sure about the ones with Mumbo
not wearing his mask. Maybe we'll ask Rareware what species he is. I wonder
what Klungo would look like as a human.
-NES Boy
P.S. Have you went to Devil's Lab Software yet? Go into press releases to see what games they had planned. There's a certain one based on a certain bear-bird game.
Chad: Cheer up? CHEER UP? I had complained that it was a chore, and now you tell me that I have to beat t with every bloody character? ARGH! Anyway, Slush is in charge of TimeVine development. The picture idea is credible, but I doubt we'd do it. The TimeVine text on its own is large enough without the burden of dozens of tiny images to load. I'm not sure if Rare is ever going to tell us what Mumbo looks like, but I doubt it will be in Banjo-Tooie. Perhaps in one of the next-gen games he'll be unmasked.
P.S. That looks strikingly similar to "Banjo-Kazooie PC", created by that Yumblie bloke.
Where can I find DonkeyKong 64 codes on the internet?
jnrfike@webtv.net
Chad: Try gamesages.com.
can you send my a completed Znes Savegame of DKC 3 ? its a SMR file !
thx DD
Slush: Sure thing! Give me your address, and I'll pull out a chunk of the chip from my DKC3 cartridge and mail it to you.
Some people...
Letter Archives
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