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12/23/99
Dear Sir-
I found it terribly unsettling that my letter appeared on your site. And under such a hideous name! This must be illegal. I demand recognition under my true name immediately, or else I shall be forced to bring you to court. Consider carefully, my friend-post my name, or lose your site. That is all.
-The Bubble Pirate, aka Megail85
P.S. and no, I didn't wrap the puppy!!!!
Ahh, yes, we're sorry. But that's what happens when you don't sign the letters, Bubble Pirate. However, in light of our apparent mistake, we will behave in a sane manner. No need to get the prorper authorities involved.... we'll come quietly...
P.S. I'm sure you didn't. You just keep saying that to yourself, and perhaps you will believe it too.
Donkey Kong Jr. is in Game & Watch Gallery 3, why isn't it in the Games section of your web site?
--SirNick5
Ahhh. Yes, Game & Watch Gallery 3 has been released, and it features Donkey Kong during his days as a child. Let me dig through the FAQ, I'm sure I can find something on this. Okay, here we go. "But games like Game and Watch Gallery and Mario's Tennis are NOT Donkey Kong Universe games. They are part of the old, dead series." No offense to fans of the old character designs or anything, but if we reported on news games that starred Donkey Kong Jr., that would be saying they are Donkey Kong Universe games, and we would have to report on the old arcade games and such. So yes, the old "dead" series isnt quite dead yet, as they make games for both Donkey Kong franchises. So to state for the zillionth time, Donkey Kong Universe games consist of any game that features the Rare designed DK or characters introduced in games with the Rare designed DK or his friends. Ack, this is hard for people to understand. And wait one cotton pickin' minute. SirNick5???? A "Sir" followed by a name followed by a number? That's.....not right.....
Wait a minute, in question 7 of the FAQ, you said "There is no Crystal Coconut". In DK64, there IS some to collect for the barrels with your kong on it (Tag Barrels don't count). What the...
-KAVM 3@aol.com
Ahh, we knew someone would eventually ask this one! Very well. The Crystal Coconut from the aforementioned television show has nothing, I repeat, NOTHING to do with Donkey Kong 64. First, the one in the television show is mystical and grants wishes and cures cancer, and much more nonsense. The real crystal coconuts are numerous, and a dime a dozen. You can find them anywhere, and they serve no other purpose, except making you big, small, flying, speedy, or invincible. Plus, they are used up very rapidly. The show's singular coconut does not exist (at least not in the Donkey Kong Universe), so we were accurate in saying "there is no Crystal Coconut". However, there are crystal coconuts. Problem solved.
When will you update the Time Vine with info like the other games (i.e. Diddy Kong Racing, Donkey Kong Land 3, Conker's Pocket Tales, Banjo-Kazooie, ect.)?
-KAVM 3@aol.com
Oh my! Don't worry then. The TimeVine, after countless nights of nagging us personally, will be updated very soon. Whether it be in one large clump or scattered amounts, it will be completed.
What songs come with the soundtrack to DK64? Any boss battle themes? Any mine cart themes?
-SirNick5
Ahh, yes, someone cares about the merchandise. Let's see what the old track listing says, shall we? Okay, it has the DK Rap, and the theme to every world, Cranky, Candy, and Funky's themes, Diddy's minecart level, the Angry Aztec Boss, the Gloomy Galleon boss, the Fungi Forest Boss, and the Ice Slide. Unfortunately, they don't have K. Rool's theme, which is probably the greatest boss theme ever. Sigh. Banjo-Tooie will hopefully have a better soundtrack. Anyway, it's worth the purchase.
Check these out! DK Toys are here!
-KAVM3@aol.com
Yes, we've known about the toys for quite some time, but we didn't want to STEAL ANOTHER SITE'S IMAGE of them like the site you linked to. NDK64. Our budget only goes so far, so consider yourself lucky that we were able to afford what we have at the DK64 Merchandising Campaign. Remember, we don't get paid for this. Never fear, though, as the first of the toys have started to roll in, and we're going to wait until they're all here before adding to the (cough) award-winning section. Possibly the day after Christmas? Yes, that sounds good, don't you think?
I've found an error in the TimeVine:
Approx. 1810 AD:
Nearly every ape on DK Island knows how to speak basic English, while some speak very fluently. Thinking of this to be a better way of communicating than "ape dialect", they decide to make it a "official" language of sorts. The apes also decide to try and teach it to other species as well.
The island where the kongs live isn't called "DK Island" until 1960 AD!
-KAVM 3@aol.com
Gasp! You again? We were laughing the other day thinking it was great were getting more and more letters (meaning that our site was dragging itself out of the gutter) until we figured out most of them were from the same people. Dornit! Ahh, okay. We were quite aware of that DK Island mention 150 years before it's time. It's just that it can get real tiring calling that chunk of ocean blockage "the ape island." So we figured that since we're not living in the year 1810, it was suitable that we called it DK Island because everyone would know what we're talking about. We may change it sometime in the future.....but then we wouldn't have the time to update the rest of the TimeVine.
Hey, I have been looking for a screenshot of Web Woods (from DKC2) and I can't find one. Do you know anywhere with a Web Woods screen shot? I have searched every where!
-kUPe
Well, the search ends here then! Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, Lovely Kwanzaa, Happy Ramadan, and a most pleasant Boxing Day! I would mention New Years, but then I would have to yammle on about HOW THE NEW MILLENIUM DOESN'T START UNTIL 2001!!! SCREW YOU SUBWAY, M&M's, DISNEY, ABC, CBS, NBC, AND RAREWHERE (okay, I didn't mean that last one, but they made the same mistake today)!!!!! HOLD ME BACK!!!!! HOLD ME BACK!!!! HOLD M--------
Our Friend: SLAP!
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