06/30/00
We certainly have a wad of stuff to unload tonight. First, stolen directy from Rarewhere we have some new Banjo-Tooie Screenshots! Then much to the delight of Chad who went into some insane religious suicidal poison yogurt type thing after hearing all the delay news, we have an updated Order of Releases. The reported delays have been debunked by Leigh Loveday, so even though some delays are still likely, everything is right on schedule for now. And THEN we have two B-T checklists: the updated Humba Wumba Transformations Checklist and the new Bosses Checklist, not to mention a new B-T Render surfacing its ugly head. Lastly, the Banjo-Tooie Screenshot Analysis has been updated a bit. Read, rinse, repeat. Enjoy all this Banjo-Tooie info, as it will be the last new Banjo game for some time. Oh, and whoever the hell the "female" known as "Sick" is....I'll see you in Hell, buttercup. You know what I'm talking about...
Update by Slush.





06/29/00
The redundancy of NDK64 Guy came in usefull after all. Crap. It appears as if Nintendo of America thinks political delays are a GOOD thing, because they've taken our last 2000-released Rare N64 game, Conker's Bad Fur Day, and pushed it back to January, 2001. This was supposed to be the greatest DKU year ever, but all we're getting is the already-released Mario Party 2, as well as DKC, Mario Tennis and Mario Tennis (four incredible games, but only FOUR... last year we had six). I'm certain that at least ONE of the three delayed games (probably Banjo-Tooie) will be finished well before the holiday season, and the fact that Nintendo is delaying it to try and avoid conflicts with their own games' releases is very perturbing. Okay, enough ranting. Just know that if you're throwing a New Years party, try to keep a low budget. You'll be spending quite a bit of money in the next two months.
Update by Chad.





06/28/00
Tonight we've decided to update. And when we made that decision to update, we decided what we wanted to update with was the updated Banjo-Tooie Speculation Center. Then somebody said that was enough, but I said no, we needed a new Artwork. Oh, and IGN64 has posted a sitdown with Mario Tennis, even though they talk about DK being "slow." That's all we decided to update with tonight, but at least we decided to update.
Update by Slush.





06/27/00
Well, here's a game we haven't updated on in quite some time. Right, well, thanks to Rarewhere, we were able to upload three brilliant Conker's Bad Fur Day MP3s, as well as a trio of new CBFD Renders. There seems to be a trend with upcoming games and renders pages, doesn't there? Well, everybody loves Raymond renders. Oh, and to the Johnston family of Park View, Michigan, I found your cat Snuffles. If you do not claim her in a week she will be mailed to the Elmer's Glue corporation. Because I said so.
Update by Chad.





06/26/00
We decided to try something new tonight. We've gone forward in time, taken the Update from tomorrow, used it today, and decided to watch the universal chaos begin as existence as we know it begins to unravel from a gut wrenching paradox. So here we go....we have for 'ya some Mario Tennis Renders, a new Feature entitled RTDKCCS: HITMVSACMTBMHIACCO, and a link to a Banjo-Tooie sitdown over at IGN64. Now let's see some paradox crunchin' action!
Update by Slush.





06/25/00
Hey. We've got a rather crappy update tonight, but there's a reason. In case you didn't notice, yesterday evening our site went back down. Well, it was just some residual error from the lightning strike. Everything's fixed and the site is back up. Be sure to check last night's update, which most of you were unable to see. Anyway, tonight there's a bit of Mario Tennis news. Upon looking at a shot from IGN64, we noticed that there are two more playable characters in the game than we previously thought. Perhaps these are going to be from Mario Tennis (GBC)? Or maybe they're ultra-secret ones that won't be announced, leaving the player to get them. Either way, it's really exciting. Oh, come on! It is! A bit.
Update by Chad.





06/24/00
What did I do today? I can assure you it wasn't buying illegal fireworks, that's for sure. Tonight we have new Banjo-Tooie Renders in hi-res (with some old ones redone in hi-res as well) and two new Artworks. Oh, and I forgot to wish Chad a happy birthday two days ago. Oh well, too late.
Update by Slush.





06/23/00
Shamboozle! Have an updated Donkey Kong Country Screenshots and a few additions to Mario Tennis Screenshots, both generously provided by IGN Pocket and IGN64 respectively, without their consent. Hey, at least we give credit. Oh, and Banjo-Tooie and Dinosaur Planet's Release Dates have UNOFFICIALLY been pushed back. Right, I'm off to save the world! (flies out the window for a few seconds, then plummets to an untimely death)
Update by Chad.





06/22/00
Nintendo Power and IGN64. What do they have in common? Well, we ripped off many new Banjo-Tooie screenshots from them! Porkalicious! They're really great and show off lots of stuff in the game, some suprising and some just plain odd. I can't wait to get the game this September! That is, if "this September" is a new slang term for "February 2001." Yeah, reports are coming in that Nintendo has decided to push the game to February even though it will be ready long before then. I guess they want one last Pokemon Christmas with Zelda their big console game. Those greedy bastards.
Update by Slush.





06/21/00
Quite a nice update tonight, actually. There's a bit of bad news, in delay form. Conker's Bad Fur Day has been pushed back to December 6th. Just a two-day delay, though. Before the link update, some B-T news. While Bottles is very much dead, the same can't be said for his brother, a drill instructor named Jamjars. Funny name, considering Kazooie mockingly called Bottles this once or twice in B-K. There is a Jinjo king somewhere in the game called King Jingaling. Perhaps this is the real name of the Jinjonator? Oh, yes, and there are several new (news-wise) and old spells in the game, (A van for new, the bee for old, and a new wind-up Kazooie, showing that this time they don't have to transform together.) But you'll see this and more in tomorrow's massive arseload of Banjo-Tooie shots. Right, the link. Tonight you may drool over Banjo-Tooie Renders! Sound good? I concur.
Update by Chad.





06/20/00

Update #2
Humperdido, we're back! After four days of server problems and three days of not updating, we've returned! We're bigger, badder.....hell, we're exactly the same as we were before. Sorry about the downtime, but we can't control where lightening strikes. Fortuantly, this will never happen again as apparently lightening never strikes the same place twice. Of course; we still have the possibility of getting knocked offline by typhoons, worker revolutions, and so on. We figured what better way to return to work then by getting rid of all the trash in our mailboxes....Letters are here!
Update by Slush.

Update #1
HELLO! Man, it's good to be back online. I deeply apologise for us not updating in the past few days, but quite simply, they changed our FTP password without informing us. We couldn't log into the server at all to upload. Can't upload, can't update. Anyway, be expecting a shiny new update tonight while we get back into the swing of things. Please do not think poorly of us for not updating, as this situation was beyond our control. Okay, now I'm off to try and reupload everything between today and May 7th. Cheers.
Update by Chad.





06/17/00
What the hell is going on here? Last night your site was down! Now, the update page is all messed up! What's going on!?

Well, see ya later,
-Little Luigi


Well, Mr. Luigi seemed to be the only person to notice that we were having a few difficulties Friday night and the majority of Saturday. The truth is that there was a freak thunderstorm in Pennsylvania (where our server is located, for some reason), and lightning struck the building and the damned thing exploded. Literally. Boom. Explode. Well, needless to say, we aren't the only site hosted by the company, so they got a shiny new one, but unfortunately all their files were last backed up May 7th. So we now face the daunting task of reuploading EVERYTHING (which is all saved on Slush and my computers) that was previously uploaded between today and May 7. So if some of the links on past Updates don't work, please bear with us. We're working as fast as we bloody can to reupload, and hopefully this will all be fixed by Monday. Once again, we apologise for the lack of an update today, but you can always listen to Friday's Mario Party music more. That's it..... forget everything.....
Update by Chad.




06/16/00
You know, it's kind of strange. We have Mario Tennis, Mario Tennis for Game Boy Color, Banjo-Tooie, Donkey Kong Country for Game Boy Color, Conker's Bad Fur Day, and Dinosaur Planet; yet we don't have any news. So here's a Mario Party Music Section. We're SORRY.
Update by Slush.





06/15/00
Hello. Tonight you can stick a Mario Party Swanky's Strife up your fife and smoke it. That taken care of, I've got a brand new B-T revelation to expose tonight, but this one has much more validity. I can't explain it, so here's Chad in italics. Take it away Chad....
Uhh... what? Anyway, I was talking to Aussie Ben about his Banjo-Tooie experience at E3 yesterday, and he happened to mention that each world now has nine Jinjos to rescue. A lightbulb went off in my head. It was rather painful. I removed the shards of glass through my nostrils and started developing a theory. Everyone remember how there are nine worlds in Banjo-Kazooie? Now, we're assuming that each world contains one multicolored "?" egg (we know that there are more eggs, no thanks to those Gameshark-huggers). So now we've got nine multicolored eggs and nine multicolored Jinjos. Call me crazy, but it seems like there very well could be a connection between the B-K eggs and the B-T Jinjos. Perhaps part of their "expanded role". Then again, I may be overanalyzing things, but it certainly is food for thought.
Update by Chad.




06/14/00
Funny story about tonight's update. I was planning to choke on a Rollo and die, meaning I would have to get someone to do the update. I had this master plan about having "John Mocker," a John Rocker impersonator, do the update all the while hurling good natured racist insults towards all of our readers. I told Chad of my plans and his exact words were, "I know what bloody mock means. But if you........ well, you're not doing that, then." I thought it about, and could see where it would offend some overly sensitive people (like the Pope, who I happen to know visits our site often). Anyway, I have nothing funny nor creative to toss at you tonight, but Rarewhere put up Banjo-Tooie MP3 music today, so we decided to rip them off and put our own Banjo-Tooie MP3 Music Section up. And Chad came up with this crazy conspiracy theory, but I can't explain it, so here's Chad in italics. Take it away Chad....
Right. Well, as those of us who have the means to play MP3s know, it is possible to store "file info" on each file. In the MP3s downloaded directly off of Rarewhere, I found some rather interesting things in the "Comments" tab. Click here for full File Info. If you'll view the image at right, you'll see what I mean. Click on the image for the full File Info for all three files. Anyway, there are a number of things this could mean. First, there's the obvious Chimpy mention. As we know, he was a character in Banjo-Kazooie. Maybe he's resurfacing. The other two comments seem to be connected. "He's a Gibbon" and "Monkey Magic". Since he does, after all, use magic, this could very well be a reference to Mumbo, although he being a gibbon makes no sense, with the pink skin and all. Then, of course, they could just be random thoughts stuck in there by Loveday or the B-T musician. In any case, I look forward to seeing the comments in any more MP3 files Rare may post.
Update by Slush.





06/13/00
Uh.... right, well, despite the new N64 design which is bloody embarassing and so far has generated mostly negative comments from Internet addictees (ourselves included), you can have a Super Smash Bros. Swanky's Strife. Right, I'm off to burn my old issues of Nintendo Power in a fit of rebellious anger towards Nintendo. That, or I just like fire. Cough.
Update by Chad.




06/12/00
Tonight Chad throws out his Mario Party Review. But for news, Donkey Kong Country (GBC) has been delayed until September 11th, 2000 in the year of our Lord. That's right, Nintendo has decided that the game would do better being sold a few weeks later or something. Whatever. I'm still trying to figure out why we did an update on Lunchables.
Update by Slush.





06/11/00
Look over here! Hey! No, don't look at the TV. Sunday night TV sucks anyway. Okay, paying attention? Good. I would like to apologise that I didn't write my Mario Party review tonight. But hey, we have something about half as entertaining! The Donkey Kong 64 Lunchables Special! Read about the absolute worst marketing ploy to date! Okay, now that you've humored me, you can go back to watching six-month-old reruns of the MTV Music Awards.
Update by Chad.




06/10/00
Get your tongues out of your cracks so you can read our latest update, you fairies! Now that I have your attention, it's time to play MYSTERY LINK! Click this link to read my latest update! What will it be? A Feature? New Screenshots? Another Music Section? The solution to your questions can be resolved with a click!
Update by Slush.





06/09/00
Tonight we've got some good news and bad news. The bad news is that Banjo-Tooie has been delayed until September 18. In addition, you now have to download the 51 new MIDI files distributed throughout the Banjo-Kazooie and Donkey Kong 64 Music Sections. So the good news? Mario Tennis 64 has moved up a month to take Banjo-Tooie's former August 28 spot. I suppose the bad news outweighs the good, eh? Well, we take pride in increasing depression.
Update by Chad.




06/08/00
The cool breezes of summer are drifting in. It may not officially be summer, but it's June, so it's summer in my opinion. But anyway, last night I had a dream where I was attacked by a fountain, the kind you see at a mall next to the fake palm trees. The fountain kept chanting, "CHEEEWWBACCCA!" and then he devoured my pinky nails. If you think that's f---ed up, wait until you read the most recent batch of Letters. They'll blow your mental stability.
Update by Slush.





A walking Monica Lewinsky joke. 06/07/00
Not much tonight, save a bit of Mario Tennis information. It seems that Camelot is becoming quite good at rekindling the life of former Mario characters. Joining Daisy, Mario's ex-damsel-in-distress, is Birdo, who some of you may remember from the American version of Super Mario Bros. 2, and Super Mario RPG. She's reportedly an excellent tennis player, so she'll more than likely be a character to unlock. More than likely her years of egg-shooting experience will come into play once more. Sorry I wasn't funny today (not that I ever am anyway).
Update by Chad.



06/06/00
Well, yesterday certainly was an interesting day to say the least. I hope our readers realize we didn't come up with that explanation in order to keep Dinosaur Planet a DKU game. I realized those things as soon as I read the comment by the DP team. But what the hell....here's our update: the musical section for a game that's been under some controversy as of yesterday....the Diddy Kong Racing Music Section. Oh, if you haven't heard, Conker's Bad Fur Day was b-tched and moaned about in Newsweek by Infogrames' CPO Bruno Bonnel (in addition with Perfect Dark). Hey, Conker gets some mainstream publicity! Excellent! Oh, and @#%#$# you, Shigeru Miyamoto....

IGN64: What do you think of Rare's lineup at the show? How about Dinosaur Planet?

Miyamoto: It looks really nice, doesn't it? I wish they would Star Fox characters so that they could use the title Star Fox Adventures. Maybe I should call the team and talk about it [laughs].

Update by Slush.





06/05/00
Well, well, well. Frequenters of Rarewhere more than likely noticed that my Scribes question about Tricky backfired. They said he's not the DKR Tricky. Well, we wrote a little ditty entitled Why Dinosaur Planet Is A Donkey Kong Universe Game Even Though The Dinosaur Planet Team Defecated On The Notion Like A Sweaty French Farmer about why Dinosaur Planet is indeed still DKU. Oh, don't say we're dangling onto our last thread of sanity. I was this afternoon when I read Scribes, but now that I rolled this over in my brain, I'm content that it's still DKU. Ah, just read the damned thing.
Update by Chad.



06/04/00
If you weren't aware, we had technical difficulties in yesterday's update. It's fixed now and everything is up the way it should be. Now, I'd like to list a few names. Krang, Andy Richter, Chewbacca, and Diddy. What do they all have in common? They're great sidekicks of course, and Chad wrote a new Feature about....DKU SIDEKICKS! Read it, or I'll sing the Super Mario Bros. Super Show theme song to you!!!
Update by Slush.





06/03/00
Right, well, even though it's basically summer (I don't need no calander seasons), we keep up our spring cleaning with the promised Big Ol' Donkey Kong Stuff List UPDATE Part Two. Okay, I'm off. Oh, wait. Slush said there would be something else, didn't he? Okay... erm.... have an updated Big Ol' Donkey Kong Character List. Remember, it's in English. You were expecting a good update, weren't you? Well, you won't find it here today! Har har har!
Update by Chad.



06/02/00
I really shouldn't make fun of the DKU.... but Donkey's weird nose is just too tempting to pass up. Tonight we update with something so intricate and massive, we couldn't handle it in one update! The Big Ol' Donkey Kong Stuff List UPDATE Part One is our main update. Don't shrug it off as being boring or uninteresting, check it out because it's detailed as crap, but we only made it halfway through Donkey Kong 64. The rest will come tomorrow with something else. Also, Fruit By The Foot has DK64 hints on their "paper rolls" now. Yeah, it tastes like crap, but oh well. And look at this Donkey Kong Country for Game Boy Color box art. It was in Nintendo Power in an ad for Electronic Boutique. It may just be a temporary box art, but it's interesting nonetheless as they included a full blown render on it (usually in EB ads they just put the game's logo on a box to advertise it in advance). Well....I'm off.
Update by Slush.




06/01/00
There's no time for monkey business on dkvine's home turf! With our basketball-sized May, 2000 Accounts, we give new meaning to the term, "razor burn!" Your jumping skills are crucial as you leap from hook to hook to avoid our double-edged update. Don't forget the Update Archives!
Update by Chad.




Update Archives