Whoo, last update of the second millennium. While Dick Clark is out getting drunk off his ass, you can read the drug-induced future.... through the 2nd Annual DKU New Years Forecast: 2001 - A Space Odyssey. See you tomorrow... hoh hoh hoh...
Update by Chad.

It's the historic "Last Slush Update of the Millennium." Here's a Mario Kart Advance General Game Info page.
Update by Slush.

Well, I've sobered up, so we actually have a substantial update - ironically not by me. Slush wrote his Donkey Kong Country First Impressions!
Update by Chad.

''Thank you very much, Firestone!'' Without beating a dead horse, I'm just going to say that we're pretty much crawling towards the new millennium. Things should certainly pick up around this trashhole then, but until that magical date occurs, we're going to be sticking you with some pretty crappy updates. Now now, it could be worse. Some sites have been down for more than six months, so at least we're taking the time to type these go-nowhere updates for you to waste your valuable time reading. Well, we do have some Donkey Kong Universe news, but that would be it for tonight (Chad had a night of boozing planned with his drinking buddies, and asked me to write a bio or something...that's the last time he'll put his faith in me!). Mario Kart Advance is now pretty much guaranteed to be a Game Boy Advance launch title, coming out in March in Japan. Excitement! Intrigue! Entertainment! This update has none of those.
Update by Slush.

Need I show this picture again? Nothing but a spotch of news tonight. Ack, sorry. It seems that rumors have started up again about a Nintendo and Sega partnership, but this time it's more than just them making an RPG with mascot characters. It's as large as a big bowl of rice pudding, I tells 'ya! There are talks that the two companies are in serious merger negotiations. Personally, I think the whole thing is cacky, and both companies deny it. It should be noted though that when asked about a possible Nintendo/Sega crossover game, a Nintendo spokesman said "no comment" and then smiled.
Update by Chad.

We didn't update yesterday, for two reasons. Number one, it was Christmas. While we updated last Christmas, we just felt like there wasn't enough to do a Christmas update justice. Let's face it, if you're going to update on the granddaddy of all (Christian) holidays, then you can't really present a Ted the Boatbuilder bio. Number two, we were working "behind the scenes" of the site. You see, whether you know it or not (and you don't, or at least didn't, or at least won't until I tell you) there are some mighty fine changes coming to this site. Mighty fine indeed...
Update by Slush.

It's Christmas Eve, and we couldn't think of a more festive update than a bigraphy for an EVIL SNOWMAN FROM HELL!!! Seriously, though, let's all wish Santa well on his annual journey, and pray that he isn't mixed up with Spontaneously Exploding Santa...
Update by Chad.

T'was the night before the night before Christmas, and all through the site, not a creature was stirring, not even Dolemite. When up in the navigation bar arose such a clatter...it was a brand new edition of Latter(s) [Letters]! Merry Hannukah/Christmas/Kwanzaa/Boxing Day/Ramadan!
Update by Slush.

Well, the world's most famous pedophile, Santa Claus, is on his way to homes, as is Hanukkah Harry for Jewish children. Kawnza and Ramadan people will have to bum gifts off the first two bearers, though. And this all has extremely little to do with the (uh... festive) updated Banjo-Tooie Connection Page.
Update by Chad.

Here we were, ready to upload with an updated B-K/B-T Connection page, when the computer crapped out and we lost everything we had worked on. So while we play with that and try to get it up as soon as possible, Chad wanted me to pass this picture along. It's of a sign behind Jiggywiggy's temple, and we have no idea what it means. Yes, that's our update. We have no idea what this means. PROOF THAT THERE IS A CONNECTION!!!111!! Seriously though, the evidence is piling up that the connection is still very much in the game, despite things being quiet on the connection front these last few weeks. Oh yeah, and Donkey Kong 64 and Super Smash Bros. are being rereleased as Player's Choice titles (meaning that not many people are buying them anymore, not that Nintendo has decided to bestow a presigious honor towards them). So have a happy Hanukkah, and may your eight nights be merry.
Update by Slush.

Yet another night sans news, so Slush plinked out his vastly superior-to-mine Chapter Fifteen of the Neverending DKU Epic Bugger. It's okay though. I consider writing chapters for that thing more of a chore than a legitimate addition to the site, which justifies his obviously greater grasp on the jumbled storyline and his further ability to manipulate it.
Update by Chad.

Tonight we have an Artwork! Super. Oh, and go to the Bulletin Board for a special surprise. Happy Holidays!
Update by Slush.

Yoo hoo! Time for another biography due to a newsless night! On the current chopping block is our old pal, Roysten. Who's Roysten, you ask? We'll leave you to figure that out.
Update by Chad.

You've gotta love complete ISP failures that prevent you from updating until 12:34 the following day. Anyway, here's a belated Chief Bloatazin Biography. Hey, at least you get to see a picture of a fat guy, and those are always funny.
Update by Slush.

Slush won't let me say what game he was playing, but rest assured: He was playing a game instead of working on the site. So here's my Chapter Whatever of the Neverending DKU Cock and Bull Epic Story Thing-o. Expect Slush's follow-up chapter tomorrow, as well as a charactericteristicly newsless day.
Update by Chad.

In a throwback to our olden days of trying to fill out the game pages, tonight our offerings are just that of Slush's Mario Tennis Review and the Mario Tennis Story So Far. I can already tell you what tomorrow night's update is, because we already have it done (long story, or maybe it's just boring). Anyway, it'll be more of our never-ending story. I bet you're wettin' yourself right now in anticipation, aren't you?
Update by Slush.

Not much tonight, other than the Japanese release of Banjo-Tooie (or as they refer to it, Banjo to Kazooie no Daibouken 2). Of note, it has placed fourth in the initial game sales charts, which sure beats the American debut of tenth. Now that Japan has the game, the only place remaining is the whole of Europe (despite the fact that the PAL conversion in Australia has already been released). It's still just speculation, but Rare may very well wait to reveal the connection hoopla once the entire world has it, so nothing will be spoiled.
Update by Chad.

Not to much to talk about tonight. We thought we could either thrill you with a Mad Jack bio, or just give you some news. We didn't feel like typing a nearly identical bio to the last two with just a few changed words, so here's some "news." This is what the latest video game sales charts look like:

1. Pokemon Gold Version (Game Boy Color)
2. Pokemon Silver Version (Game Boy Color)
3. WWF Smackdown 2 (Playstation)
4. The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask (Nintendo 64)
5. Final Fantasy IX (Playstatioin)
6. Donkey Kong Country (Game Boy Color)
7. Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2 (Playstation)
8. Driver 2 (Playstation)
9. WWF No Mercy (Nintendo 64)
10. Banjo-Tooie (Nintendo 64)

It's encouraging that both DKU games are on the charts, even though B-T came in relatively low. It's not that surprising though, considering Nintendo's curious marketing strategy. They've seem to be pushing DKC harder than Banjo-Tooie, but Donkey Kong games also have a bigger built-in fanbase than the Banjo series (due to DK being more established than Banjo). Well, that about does it. President Dubbya, huh? Hey, if my little brother was the governor of Florida, even I could be president.
Update by Slush.

There's no DKU news tonight, and this is a bit of a last-minute update, but I noticed something odd while running about Jolly Roger's Lagoon today... you see the structure off in the water? It's inaccessable due to invisible walls, and has no definitive use at all. It may just be a clipping error, but I doubt Rare would have bothered texturing and shadowing it if this were the case. Perhaps it's used by Blackeye's boat to dock in? Ah well, we'll just have to wait for Rare themselves to spill the beans on this whole connection fiasco.
Update by Chad.

We're both incredibly busy, so here's a Damn Dogadon Biography. We stink to high heaven.
Update by Slush.

This is quite possibly the greatest update we've ever had. And it comes to you in the form of a pointless Army Dillo Biography! Whooooo! Er...
Update by Chad.

We set out to easily update a pre-existing page, and that's exactly what we did. The Big Ol' Donkey Kong Character List (In English) has been updated reflecting Banjo-Tooie's characters. Just keep in mind that if you haven't beat it yet and consider character names as a spoiler, you should probably sit this one out. Here's a B. Locker Bio too, because it has nothing to do with Banjo-Tooie but I decided to do one anyway.
Update by Slush.

As promised many moons ago, here's a new Letters at long last. Also, Mario Party 3 has been released in Japan, so we should get a solid North America release any day now.
Update by Chad.

Mumbo loots the corpse of Robert Muldoon. Good news for those of you living Down Under... the PAL conversion is complete, and Australian residents can now find Banjo-Tooie at their local retailer. Within the next few days, keep an eye on Rarewhere for the promised PAL counterpart to their NTSC Banjo-Tooie contest. Oh, and there's one last curiosity I may as well mention while I'm at it. NCL (Nintendo Japan) recently updated their N64 release list, with Conker's Bad Fur Day in a "TBA 2001" slot. The odd thing is, Nintendo was listed as publisher. Call me crazy, but doesn't Rare retain publishing rights to Conker games?
Update by Slush.

Two spots of news for you tonight. The first comes from IGN64, who claims that Conker's Bad Fur Day will get a less-than-favourable shipment. It seems Nintendo will only send out between 400 and 500 thousand copies throughout 2001. Just be sure you reserve it as soon as possible, guaranteeing the unspeakable won't happen. Dousing polygonal demons in urine is an absolute necessity. Lastly, our caramelized buddies at RareOps claim Banjo-Tooie's alledged "Bottles' Revenge" counter-op mode is nothing more than a satanic pipe dream. Right, I'm off to cook a batch of Prozac.
Update by Chad.

Well, we don't really have much of an update tonight (maybe tomorrow, cough cough). We do have some minor Banjo-Tooie related news though, because we know you can never get enough of that. Rare told ComputerandVideogames.com that the inclusion of Sabre Man, their old character from the game Sabre Wulf, in Banjo-Tooie was a "teaser." This probably means that Rare is indeed working or thinking about working on a new Sabre Wulf game for GAMECUBE. While it's non-DKU, you never know if any DKU characters will appear. I mean, Sabre Man appeared in B-T...
Update by Slush.

We just can't get enough of muddling over the Banjo-Tooie connection, can we? I feel sorry for the DKC team. They put out a great port and we're all focusing on a two year old game. Tsk. Anyhoo, to make the situation only worse, here's some Undeniable Proof of a Banjo-Kazooie Connection! We know it's been a while since Letters. I just got a new computer, which has rendered checking my e-mail a bit impossible. We'll answer your queries as soon as possible, I assure you.
Update by Chad.

Well it's a pointless Sunday night update tonight, and all we have for you is THIS UPDATE. Maybe the coming of Monday will bring some better material to work with.
Update by Slush.

Hey, look! It's December.... Second..... Sorry we didn't update yesterday, but we were both only slightly drunk and typing into Notepad didn't sound like a sobering experience. Anyhoo, here's a feature on a subject we're all sick of hearing about, A Look at the B-K/B-T Connection Crisis! Take it in to your homes.
Update by Chad.

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