With half of the staff 'self-imposing' themselves in "exile," Ben asked me to update with his Super Smash Bros. Review. I considered turning him down, because my job description doesn't say a damn thing about writing updates, and I never have before, but then I realized it was a grand way to get in some gratuitous Gay Carl pictures. Enjoy, bitches.
Update by Our Friend.

Do I not care about the site anymore? No, that's not true. Donkey Kong's Jungle Vine is still very important to me, and I'm fond of all of our readers, especially the majority of our regulars in the UBB. This isn't an update, so to speak, but more of an explanation of where we've been (or at least, I've been), and where we're going (or at least, where I'm going). April has been an extremely busy month for me, and with my mounting frustration with the video game industry, I felt it would be best for the readers if I gave myself a self-imposed exile for a period of time to cool down. You were getting sick of nothing but ill-tempered rants, and so was I, but it was all I could find myself to write when faced with having to pen something new and entertaining about Donkey Kong. Updates be damned, I was just going to dissapear for a while and try to find the enthusiastic, all-caps typing Donkey Kong loving kid I used to be. I don't know if I've found him yet, honestly.

Even if I was bouncing up and down over a new wallpaper of God knows what, I wouldn't have the time right now to type up a synopsis of it. I graduate high school in a month, and with that comes the final school work crunch and awkward transition into adulthood. Not to mention my well-documented and ongoing lady troubles (oh my!), and it's easy to see where I don't have the space and motivation to do an update. I was actually planning on doing one last Sunday, but then they have to go kill The Lone Gunmen on The X-Files. Tsk tsk.

I guess this is nothing but a ramble, but I felt I had to clear up where I've been. This isn't a eulogy. This isn't a farewell. I'll be back doing regular work soon enough. However, I'm working on another project right now that's completely seperate from DKVine... and even more important. It's something I'm (and somebody else) is really anxious about, and when it's finished, we'll just have to see where the site stands. There's four editors, a sadistic camera, and enough readers, so I can't really see the site just vanishing all together in the future. But that old enthusiasm I had for DKVine? It's currently in this project. Will I ever get it back for this site? Thinking about it carefully, I don't think so, but that doesn't mean I can't find a close facsimile. If nothing else, maybe I can muster up something that doesn't turn into a Miyamoto tirade.

Sadly, even this isn't that. Miyamoto, you suck. See you soon, amigos.
Update by Slush.

Could this have been the longest we've gone without an update? Possibly. But who cares. Anyway, salivate over a shiny new wallpaper from Videogame Developers Rare Ltd., in two groovy sizes. It's stylish art of Gregg standing in fronting of Count Batula's home, or perhaps Luigi's Mansion. Head on over to their page and decide for yourself.

Chad: Also, I put it on the CBFD Wallpapers page. Who doesn't care about the site now, you spoiled bastards?
Update by Aussie Ben.

Why bother working when you can get someone else to do it, I always say. Thank heaven for the Reader Reviews section. Here's one of Conker's Bad Fur Day by Glancy, mindless drone loyal reader.

We accept cash, cheque or money order.
Update by Aussie Ben.

Haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw!
Update by Slush.

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